Are we missing the part where he stole her baby
“Try to get her back, bitch. CARE BEAR BLAST!!!” -Jesus
That was Jesus’ baby all along. If you don’t believe me we’ll have to cut it in half to see who the real mother is. Jesus, the son of God, or this random sinner, a woman.
Personally my money is on the literal son of God being the mother.
🌈🌈 Catholicism🌈🌈
Jesus: the original mpreg fanfiction
I dunno - in most religious art a baby in a holy context is Jesus.
Maybe he’s holding his younger self in some sort of time traveler paradox? And using the power of France to protect his younger self from women as an archetype?
Like “No, stay away from this baby me, all womens. By the power of baguettes I compel thee.”
If France is going to use America/Jesus’s colors they could at least pay royalties
They pay in statues of liberty
I feel like they are behind on their payments.
Well I think we’re due for another installment then!
This is an exceptionally reasonable take.
It’s this sacre bleu ?
Blanc et rouge
🚫🤢fr*nch🤮🚫
“Never been a sinner, I’ve never sinned, I’ve got a friend in Jesus So you know that when I die, He’s gonna set me up with the spirit in the sky”
“Je n’ai jamais été pécheur, je n’ai jamais péché, j’ai un ami en Jésus. Alors tu sais que quand je mourrai, il m’installera avec l’esprit dans le ciel”
.
.
.
attendez un moment
Cruel and UNUSUAL
The colours are the wrong way around. I’m sure everyone noticed but my point is I think it’s almost never represented the wrong way around in France.
They’re the right way from Jesus’s perspective I guess.
“From a certain point of view”
This French origin story is better than the real one
Removed by mod
She’s welcome! Jesus can go fuck himself. We banned him during the revolution already.
French Jesus strikes again
Let them eat bagels
Imagine being a Fr*nch person 🤮
Hon hon hon tabernac je suis français!
Pray the french away!
Je pense que j’ai merdé