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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/lmiadje on 2023-09-04 22:42:44.
Last week, my husband, Arthur, (28m) and I (28f) got married. Arthur and I have been dating since the 5th grade, we got pregnant with our daughter, Violet (13f) when we were 15. After Violet was born, we decided we wanted to wait before making any big decisions about our lives.
Last year, Arthur and I decided it was finally time for us to get married. He went out and bought a ring and shortly after we started making wedding plans.
Our daughter Violet is everything to us and we wanted to make sure that she was a part of helping out with the wedding. Violet had her own stuff going on with school, but she was helping us decide how she would be a part of our wedding throughout.
During this process, as I said, she had her own stuff going on. Violet is autistic and has never been very social, she hasn’t been bullied but also didn’t have many friends. This is why we were surprised when she told us a boy, Brighton, asked her to be her valentine this year. She then told us how he would always invite her to play with his team and he’d teach her the skills for the games and they’d win because him and his friends were athletic boys, on the baseball team and she thought he was out of her league.
In the past 6-7 months, he and Violet have been dating and Violet has become much more social. Violet was also never a hugger or kisser, even refusing them from me and Arthur, but with Brighton, she is normally the one asking for hugs and kisses. Brighton was invited to the wedding and Violet helped him find a matching suit with her dress and he’s been amazing during this process. We helped his baseball team’s fundraiser by buying magnets for them and putting them in the goodie bags.
During the wedding last week, Brighton and Violet shared a slow dance and in Violet’s speech, she mentioned how she hoped her and Brighton would end up like us one day. Violet was with him almost the entire time.
The issue with this was how my mother (57f) and my sister (26f) reacted. Both of them kept asking me what Violet was so attached to Brighton, especially when she wouldn’t even hug or kiss them or Arthur and me. I told them to let it go, but they kept insisting to me it was disrespectful. Our dad tried intervening, telling them to lay off but they wouldn’t. I then asked to speak to dad privately and asked him if he could move this convo to the car and try to get to them. He did that, and after about 20 minutes they finally came back.
Shortly after the wedding was over, both mom and my sister were texting me saying it was rude of me to put my issues onto him and insisted I should talk to my daughter about how family is just as important as Brighton. AITA?
NTA