This happens to me when I rarely open up Facebook. I’d see someone I was obsessing over in the 10s, and now I just wonder what I was ever feeling with them. It’s not like something happened and they’re massively different, they’re more or less the same. Really the world changed a lot and I’m not the LIB I used to be.

I’m not dating anyone new now. But if I had to judge someone as hot, they would have many of the following characteristics:

  • left of some soft (Marxist, Anarchist, hell I’ll date a decent socdem)
  • mask wearing
  • vegan
  • high empathy, worry about the suffering of others
  • reader
  • actively organising something in their community

To be honest, I had a pretty basic taste in dates back in the day. If anything, this should be a self-crit.

  • axont [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
    23·
    4 months ago

    Dated someone for like 2 weeks, felt stuff for them. At one point they say they have something special to show me, something I’m going to like.

    They pull out a wood carving of a swastika interlaced with a star of David. I’m immediately like “huh.” They’re all smiles asking me if I feel anything from it. They get confused when I ask if this is a weird joke or something.

    Over the next hour I put together they’re a deep level member of the Raëlian Church. UFOs, magical symbols, seraphins visiting and a weird amount of transphobia even though 1) I thought Raëlians were cool with that and 2) I’m very obviously non-binary. They tell me stories of how the covid vaccine gave them amnesia, how they believe they’re a clone. After the second date I get a bunch of texts claiming that aliens had replaced them in the night, with some sounding panicked. I got pictures of their hair with things like “Abduction last night. Clear change in hair length on left side.”

    I should have noticed all the signs, but they were really into me and I was desperate for attention. Sometimes I think about what it could have been like, they were actually a vegan, seemed to have legitimate interest in me as a person too. I kept getting a “I can fix them feeling” but looking back now I realize I was just starved. They were one of only two people who ever expressed romantic interest in me.

    • ButtBidet [he/him]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
      12·
      4 months ago

      I should have noticed all the signs, but they were really into me and I was desperate for attention. Sometimes I think about what it could have been like, they were actually a vegan, seemed to have legitimate interest in me as a person too.

      I’ve been exactly here, comrade. Loneliness is hella painful. I’m glad that you’re OK now. I hope that she’s fine.

      • axont [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
        8·
        4 months ago

        Yeah I’m ok, I’m more comfortable with myself these days and realizing I’m more on the grey-asexual spectrum, which has really helped with the loneliness somehow. ace-heart

    • CupcakeOfSpice [she/her]@hexbear.netEnglish
      6·
      4 months ago

      I get vibes of someone with a psychotic disorder. Sounds like they needed help, though I don’t mean to imply you needed to be the one to help them. I think you made the right choice; just hope they can someday get the help it sounds like they need.

      • axont [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
        5·
        4 months ago

        Yeah I eventually got that vibe too and had no idea what to do. There was an instance one night where I got about 150 text messages in a row, sometimes of repeated numbers or people’s names. It got scary.

    • Chronicon [comrade/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
      2·
      4 months ago

      Abduction last night. Clear change in hair length on left side.

      They have a cat? one of my friend’s cats regularly munches on her hair while she sleeps

      That’s rough though, I can definitely relate to just being like “but they like me that never happens” to excuse shit just not working