I’m an ex incel myself, but I’ve been seeing a few users here exhibiting the tell tale signs. “I’m not attractive enough”, “I don’t socialize correctly”, “I’ll never find a woman” - all extremely unhealthy attitudes.
Personally I burned through many friendships and ruined a lot of chances with women because I was in the incel community. The community warped my view of women so much that I made it even harder to meet women, I became my own worst enemy. I lost friends because all I could think of was how horrible it was that they had girlfriends.
I have a friend who helped me out of it. She was the one who started calling out my bad behavior for what it was, and I started on the long uphill path out of it. I’m now married and stable for well over a decade, but I still think back to those days, and it depresses me seeing other people causing this themselves and not being aware of it.
So, Lemmy, for those who have clawed out of it, what’s your story?
So it’s not that we identified as femcel and incel to each other, just later on we began talking about ourselves more openly. I made a post to talk to people while doing an activity together and she’s one of the first to message me (I didn’t even know she was female until I heard her voice). We were both very respectful to each other anyway, as I think we both took it as an opportunity to get away from our own loneliness.
Also we’re not the usual type of “incels” (we’re both attractive), it’s more like the circumstances we’re in, what we went through, and our personalities that led to that