For the purpose of this question, the target age range is 20-30. Asking because I feel like I’m wasting my youth.
Learn how to be happy alone. Simple!
Really though, if you figure this out, a lot of other things click into place. I used to think it was impossible. Just words miserable people said to make themselves feel less lonely.
Okay, sometimes it’s still that, but I’ve come to enjoy being able to focus on whatever I want to focus on without the distractions, drama, and/or gnawing desperation.
Put money aside for the future.
Master your inner dialogue and emotions.
Practice speaking positively and rationally to yourself. Use affirmations, mantras, or visualisations for confidence, for forgiveness of yourself and others, relaxation, motivation.
If you ever feel like crying, it is important to cry hard and deep, and then it’s important to recover after with some kind of happy celebration, whether it’s playing or a treat, just something nice to help your body learn to get happy after being sad, angry, or scared.
Stop reaching for distractions when powerful emotions come on. Face the emotion. Study it with curiosity. Feel it fully. And comfort yourself positively until it passes.
Start down this road now. You don’t want to end up 40, done with school, done with your parents, done with your first couple of real jobs, and have no idea how to control yourself throughout the day.
Forgive yourself and others but learn from those experiences. As a saying goes "Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”
This is really valuable advise. I’m 20 at this point, and (after therapy) I’m looking back and realizing now much self-acceptance and connection with your own emotion shape the way I perceive the world. I’m really glad that I started this young, and for people who live in a country where psychotherapy is covered by healthcare - there are usually offers of a short psychotherapy (in Germany it’s called Kurzzeitherapie, short-term therapy) which will in my opinion as a psychology student will benefit every person.
Vote.
I’d also add participate in local politics. There’s no law saying a 20 year old can’t be any elected official but president.
There is, it’s the constitution. You can’t be a member of the House without being 25 or a senator without being 30.
However there exist countries with own constitutions outside of the US
Even in the US, state-level representation hardly counts as local. Neighborhoods, towns, counties, etc. all have people representing them.
It’s cool to care about and build up your community.
Protect your hearing. Listen to loud music in moderation and use earplugs in loud environments.
Most practical advice I’ve seen in this thread. For anyone who wants to protect their hearing at a concert without making the music sound muffled, check out these flat frequency ear plugs:
https://www.etymotic.com/product/etyplugs-high-fidelity-earplugs/
Those are great but I recently switched to these. They are a little more expensive but they come with three different filters for different decibel levels.
Please wear them at shows. Coming home with your ears feeling like you are underwater and ringing is a sign you’ve damaged them. I don’t know why they insist on making shows so damn loud.
I’ve always had the anti-neighbour style setup. Much less harmful to your ears than headphones
Floss and make regular dentist visits, prioritize fitness and make it a habit for the rest of your life, and don’t allow negative people in your life
20 years ago I would have said invest regularly in an index fund.
Today I think you should learn all you can about DIY water filtration and growing edible mushrooms in caves.
Have to invest points in radiation resistance.
Learn about retirement plans. Compound interest is a young person’s best friend. Compound interest makes rich old people.
Every dollar you sock away in your 20s is worth so much more than waiting until you are in your 50s
Wear. Sunscreen.
Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life.
The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives,
some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.
If you absolutely hate sunscreen for sensory reasons, check out UPF jackets and other clothing. I live in a place where the UV is 11+ every day in the summer and it works great without being suffocatingly hot. Being able to just throw a jacket on and go outside without worrying about sunburn is pretty great.
Woman in tropical countries cover themselves in very light long sleaved tops. I bought one in Vietnam for my wife.
Wear a wide brimmed hat too. You’ll look jaunty while protecting your head.
What is the material like, does it get hot inside? Is there a brand that you recommend?
The one I have is from REI and made of modal (similar to rayon, made from wood pulp), it’s the only one I’ve used but it feels very nice, soft, and lightweight. I don’t ever feel like I’d be better off not wearing it if I’m in direct sunlight, and sweat dries from it fairly quickly. I’ve been hot while wearing it but not any hotter than I would have been standing in the sun to begin with, you know? I’ve also never had it fail and result in a burn, and my dermatologist was enthusiastic about it when I brought up that I’d been using that instead of sunscreen.
The main reason I went with that brand was because I couldn’t find any non-polyester options anywhere else. There’s nothing wrong with them functionally, I just try to avoid polyester in general.
Why?
Skin cancer is a bitch.
Do you mean wear sunscreen every day, or just when needed?
Don’t fry yourself or use tanning beds. Getting your skin scraped down to a weeping ulcer is not fun and even that is much better than what you could get.
Oh yeah this one. Plus, wear a hat. My hairstylist found skin cancer on my scalp a year or two ago and now I have a bald spot where they removed it because scalp skin doesn’t have a whole lot of excess to close a wound. So cute. Thankfully, I can hide it, but it pretty much requires me to wear my hair up every day.
Eta: I feel like it should go without saying, but maybe doesn’t, that I was incredibly lucky that it was basal cell, not melanoma. A big scar is one of the best outcomes I could’ve had.
My wife got it on top of her foot from wearing sandals for decades
Learn to cook!
It’s great fun if you can get into it, it fulfills one of your basic needs in a much more fun and satisfying way, and it can be a good and attractive quality in a future partner and / or fun to do with them.
So many people I know who after college ended up living on crap. At best they only knew how to boil pasta. I got a cookbook on my favorite cuisine at the time and started trying all sorts of recipes when I first lived on my own. I tell my wife “If you can follow instructions you can cook” and she said “I hate following instructions.” lol
Get away from tech on a regular basis. Allow yourself to be in your own thoughts occasionally. I think constantly being tied to phones and the internet is killing creativity because we never have those day dreaming moments that lead to inspiration.
Don’t spend huge chunks of your life on video games. They are a fun distraction but at the end of the day is it just bits on some server that could be shut down at any moment. Get off of the dopamine treadmill.
Get a service industry job to learn a healthy sense of misanthropy
I don’t recommend it, but it can definitely give you a perspective of the kind of shit people have to put up with
Take care of your body and keep it healthy. You have plenty of time to acquire habits helping that and slowly get rid of those damaging it - use that time before the issue is forced on you.
I tell people to keep an eye on their diet. Once you hit your early 20s that whole teen “I can eat a whole pizza and be fine” is gone. It is incredibly easy to go over your calorie needs in a week and after a year you’ve gained 2-3 lbs or more. Before you know it by 30 or 40 you are 50+ lbs over and obese and now you are struggling to lose it. It creeps up on you.
Live alone and single at some point in your life.
It’s shocking how many people never learn to just be themselves, by themselves. And I don’t mean for a month or two. Get to know yourself before you settle in together with somebody else.
In THIS economy?!
That’s a good point. We’re going to have a lot of really stunted people who never got the chance to live alone and learn about themselves because nobody can afford rent anymore.
Psychedelics.
