• I'm back on my BS 🤪@lemmy.autism.placeM
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    23 days ago

    Apparently, I have a sensitive sense of smell that’s attached to my memory. I hadn’t seen my sister for 7 years once. When I saw her again and she hugged me, the first thing I said was, “You smell the same.”

    Some people have told me that I “see everything”. Anyone else ever been told this? I guess I perceive details and changes a lot more than most people? I find it odd though, because I definitely overlook a lot of things. Like the most major things, I will overlook. I had friends that had black rocks/crumbled asphalt around their driveway. I used to go there almost daily. One day, they covered the black asphalt with white rocks. I didn’t notice until they pointed it out. Is that a thing? Or could it be dissociation? I’m confused by it.

    I’ve been told I’m really smart, but I honestly think I’m an idiot. Like, I can understand science, history, theories, etc., but that’s so simple because it’s just facts and logic. I can get hyper-fixated on a topic and become an expert at it. However, I can’t have a small talk conversation without coming off as dumb, nervous, shy, aloof, or rude. Sending work emails is an event for me because I have to figure out if I’m being rude, insulting, unprofessional, too friendly, or giving too many details. Shoot. People will laugh at something I said that was dumb or aloof at least once a week. Not that I’m ashamed of it, but it’s just a sign of me missing something. I know I’m stupid. It’s okay. Also, people will tell me things and I just believe them. Later on, when something goes bad, I get told that I should have known better or it’s my fault for staying in that situation. 🤷

    My ultimate talent is being confused. If I had a catch phrase, it would be, “What’s happening?”