Haven’t dated since my 20s. Got cheated on a lot. Like all of them. Some of them even bragged about cheating, to my face.
In my 30s, I put 0 effort into dating. The only type of women that wanted to ‘date’ me basically wanted me to take care of their kids, pay for shit, but they weren’t looking for anything serious or any more kids (spoiler, that was a lie). Last person, someone I’ve known for years, asked if I’d be interested in having kids with her since we are getting close to 40 and neither of us had started a family yet. But, I was to be just a sperm donor, obviously be financially responsible, but have no say in anything with the kids… But it was totally going to be 50/50! Turned her away. That one tore me up because I’ve really wanted to have kids for a long time. Painfully obvious she just wanted me involved for money and nothing else. Now her mom is bank rolling all her dreams.
I miss having someone to talk to, to make plans with, to share wonderful build a life with. But I don’t miss the drama, the games, the cheating, and the lies.
Because relationships takes works and I realized that I am happier putting that work into me instead.
I don’t put effort into not being single
Because I finally came to the conclusion that I’m happier, healthier, and like myself better when I’m a bachelor.
I am single by choice because I am going through mental health relapse. That’s never a good time to have a relationship, as much as I would like to have one. For the time being, I realize that the single life is easier and makes the most amount of sense.
My social skills are probably near null, I avoid interaction and just say just the bare minimum of words. And I get talkative then all I speak is about tech, science or history. Edit: And I’m actually fine as single.
The single life isn’t so bad really.
Removed by mod
Needed to figure some stuff out about myself after a break up. Now it’s just getting out there and letting things happen organically.
The mental block and also the fatigue from the last break up 2 years ago.
When I was single for much longer than I liked it myself, it was for a large part because, unbeknownst to me, my style of humor was quite hurtful to others, making me quite the asshole. Needed a while to figure that out, because me being the asshole was not an idea that went down well.
Decided after my last breakup that i cant do this shit again or i will probably off myself… Its been 10 years and now i cant remember how to talk to women…
It definitely takes practice. The more often you put yourself out there, the better you’ll get. Or you’ll find someone that loves you for not being good at talking, which is even better.
I’m getting divorced as we speak, nothing is officially signed yet but it will come.
After 13 years of this relationship, I want to be alone at home and won’t be looking for any romance any time soon. Just plain old « enjoyment » and we’ll see what happens in the future.
Severe social anxiety. I can handle basic small talk, but anything resembling flirting is out of the question.
Because no woman close to my age has shown interest in me.
Cuz I’m fuckin lame, ugly, and put off a creepy vibe or something. I was staying at a hotel recently and complimented the lady at the desk on the hair ribbons she always wore. She didn’t wear them any more afterwards. After that I feel like I should just give up because clearly nothing is ever going anywhere.
Never compliment ladies you don’t know about how they look, it comes off as creepy. Doesnt matter who does it.
You wouldn’t walk up to a random guy and give a compliment right? So you need to start from the beginning and get to know her, just like a guy friend.
Honestly I think we should normalize giving compliments to each other. It’s kind of sad that it feels weird to give another guy a compliment and creepy giving a girl a compliment.
Absolutely. It used to be appriciated by girls when a guy gives a compliment but things are very different today.
I am a man and I absolutely have given other men compliments. Specifically their shirts if they’re a band I like and I’ve received those too. I am very happy when someone compliments my attire or hair.
I think we should normalize giving each other compliments regardless of gender, as another user said. Of course it shouldn’t be like an exaggerated amount but it would be nice to prop each other up and boost all our confidences. I think that we could tell each other nice things more often. We could certainly be kinder to one another.
Same. I’ve given men and women compliments and have gotten random compliments from both. Usually tshirts or hair styles or tattoos that run close to what I like. I think it’s more about how it’s said. Informal compliments are best as it doesn’t put assumptions on the other side. “That’s a cool hair ribbon” is different than “I love when you wear your hair ribbons”. The assumption of feelings isn’t in the first one. More compliments should be given out freely if you genuinely feel a certain way. Just don’t go full lovestruck on the ice breaker.
