http://smbc-comics.com/comic/ex-2
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Sadly, the patreon subscriber ideas were all better than mine.
Bonus panel
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Isn’t exspired already a word, we just spell it expired? Personally I expect more from the xkcd guy.
Edit: I have no idea how to use spoiler tags, source for my dumb joke calling him the xkcd guy: https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/religion-ruining-everything-since-4004-bc