As a person long overdue to get some mental help. I’ve been really motivated to get myself better since early last year. Had some events happen where I was like, yeah I need to handle my shit.
I’ll say the process so far is my biggest hurdle. Took ages to get a referral, once I got the referral took ages to get seen. When I finally was seen it was the wrong fit. Now I’m waiting until next week to start again and push for different referrals, all so my insurance covers some of it (maybe).
Meanwhile I’m doing the best I can, but certainly think about just throwing in the towel and drowning myself in drugs again. Which worked a long time until it really really didn’t work. But the thought of finally getting my foot in the door to spend months and thousands trying to even find a root cause just feels utterly pointless. Also now raw dogging life without anything to dull it but some doctor prescribed sleeping pills is challenging to say the least.
Still the worst part is explaining the laundry list of my past trauma to strangers just to get them up to speed. Hopefully to help pinpoint where I need to focus my efforts on getting better. Last fellow just had to say “well you made it this far and seem to be doing better than most of my patients”. Essentially call me back when you have a full blown meltdown, because I only deal with extremes. That shit was deflating, sorry for being proactive and trying to get help before I get committed somewhere?
I’ve spent a really long time keeping my issues in check, I’ve become very good at what to say or not say that is bouncing around my skull. Now that I can’t do it anymore it seems to throw a lot of people for a loop.
Anyhow feels like some sort of shitty race to see if my mind breaks first or I get help before that happens. Than when I do get to the right step 1 there will be this slow trial and error I need to go through. Which I completely understand is necessary, but it’s not giving me much hope.
That person on fire is probably like that because the healthcare system just kept dosing it with gasoline before they stepped foot in the office.
Just started with a therapist after a decade or two of mistrust in them, and yeah, getting them up to speed on all your past and trauma is time consuming, especially when you only get an hour a week to walk through your life story and try to get techniques that help you feel less like shit.
Idk if it will make you feel any better, but you’re not alone. I have a few people in my life who struggle the same as you are, and it emotionally fucks with me. As someone who is somewhat put together myself, to see these people I care about genuinely try to get help and do the right thing to get better - all to be mistreated and counted as another number hurts so bad. I can see it in their tear soaked eyes, and I can hear it in their cries and desperate pleas for help that they feel so helpless and feel like nothing is working no matter how hard they try. I try to listen, to comfort, and to maybe give advice and motivation to keep trying, but it’s all so hard.
The mental health care system in the u.s. is abysmal, it’s gut-wrenchingly bad. It fails people every day. Every day people relapse because they feel like it’s the only way to cope with whatever it is they’re dealing with. I wish I could help more people, I wish I could help you all.
i have a referral on the table to begin sessions with a new therapist and have been putting off making the appointment because of the tedium of “getting it all out there” only to find out months from now that (for whatever reason) it was a wasted effort.
i honestly don’t know what progress would look like. does it make sense for me to get my expectations in order before making the appointment?.. or should i just jump in?
I feel like this the blind leading the blind. But I settled on trying to push for a psych evaluation instead of jumping into sessions. I’ve also been journaling my mental state and sleep daily, so I can be prepared this time. Roughest thing I did was physically writing out my past trauma/history, but figured I’d have that on hand too so I had a checklist of things I can remember to talk about. Maybe disconnect it when I talk about it.
Figure with all that at least I can get a baseline opinion out of it and if I don’t like the person this time I have some actionable items I can plug in for people that specialize in what might crop up.
My issues though are not clear so I’m just struggling to find the right path. I hope you keep at it, just as much as I do.
this is excellent advice. my immediate response to it is, of course, to cringe and shy away. but i admit that a bit of journaling would raise my confidence level a lot.
Oh it’s not easy, I keep stopping and forcing myself to restart. But it’s been invaluable, because when I look back I realized how shitty my memory is. Half of the things I put in there I wouldn’t remember if I didn’t write them down.
i have decided to call in the morning and find out what their scheduling looks like for the next couple of months, and also what prescribing looks like if we want to go that route.
those two pieces of information, and also simply making contact, will help me get my mind right about it.
I’m sorry you are going through that. If you’re unaware psychologytoday.com is a great resource. They let you search based on insurance, specialties, in person/virtual, any preferences one might have,
and the professionals also might include info about them maybe even a video.
I hope you get the help you have been fighting for soon.
I made the mistake the first time by just taking my family doctor’s opinion because I’m newer to the area and have no idea where to start. He sent me to the group who had asshole #1 and I found out afterwards that guy had a lot negative reviews for the same issues I had. The group was ok, but he was the worst and I got placed with him because everyone else was full. I was ignorant and was just desperate to get “somewhere”. Boy was that a mistake.
Bigger problem I’m finding is there is a very small list for my area. Once I popped in the filter for non-secular it gets barren. I live in a very religious area, I’m not anti-religion. But I am an atheist that doesn’t want to go to someone who tells me to confide in God to heal myself. Been to one of those before, just doesn’t work.
Even as someone who’s religious, I’m not going to pay a therapist what a priest will tell me whether or not I pay. (This is pretending my religion would even have therapists peddling it as though this wasn’t just an extremely Christian thing).
Completely vulnerable moment
As a person long overdue to get some mental help. I’ve been really motivated to get myself better since early last year. Had some events happen where I was like, yeah I need to handle my shit.
I’ll say the process so far is my biggest hurdle. Took ages to get a referral, once I got the referral took ages to get seen. When I finally was seen it was the wrong fit. Now I’m waiting until next week to start again and push for different referrals, all so my insurance covers some of it (maybe).
Meanwhile I’m doing the best I can, but certainly think about just throwing in the towel and drowning myself in drugs again. Which worked a long time until it really really didn’t work. But the thought of finally getting my foot in the door to spend months and thousands trying to even find a root cause just feels utterly pointless. Also now raw dogging life without anything to dull it but some doctor prescribed sleeping pills is challenging to say the least.
Still the worst part is explaining the laundry list of my past trauma to strangers just to get them up to speed. Hopefully to help pinpoint where I need to focus my efforts on getting better. Last fellow just had to say “well you made it this far and seem to be doing better than most of my patients”. Essentially call me back when you have a full blown meltdown, because I only deal with extremes. That shit was deflating, sorry for being proactive and trying to get help before I get committed somewhere?
I’ve spent a really long time keeping my issues in check, I’ve become very good at what to say or not say that is bouncing around my skull. Now that I can’t do it anymore it seems to throw a lot of people for a loop.
Anyhow feels like some sort of shitty race to see if my mind breaks first or I get help before that happens. Than when I do get to the right step 1 there will be this slow trial and error I need to go through. Which I completely understand is necessary, but it’s not giving me much hope.
That person on fire is probably like that because the healthcare system just kept dosing it with gasoline before they stepped foot in the office.
Just started with a therapist after a decade or two of mistrust in them, and yeah, getting them up to speed on all your past and trauma is time consuming, especially when you only get an hour a week to walk through your life story and try to get techniques that help you feel less like shit.
Idk if it will make you feel any better, but you’re not alone. I have a few people in my life who struggle the same as you are, and it emotionally fucks with me. As someone who is somewhat put together myself, to see these people I care about genuinely try to get help and do the right thing to get better - all to be mistreated and counted as another number hurts so bad. I can see it in their tear soaked eyes, and I can hear it in their cries and desperate pleas for help that they feel so helpless and feel like nothing is working no matter how hard they try. I try to listen, to comfort, and to maybe give advice and motivation to keep trying, but it’s all so hard.
The mental health care system in the u.s. is abysmal, it’s gut-wrenchingly bad. It fails people every day. Every day people relapse because they feel like it’s the only way to cope with whatever it is they’re dealing with. I wish I could help more people, I wish I could help you all.
Thanks it helps.
i feel this so much.
i have a referral on the table to begin sessions with a new therapist and have been putting off making the appointment because of the tedium of “getting it all out there” only to find out months from now that (for whatever reason) it was a wasted effort.
i honestly don’t know what progress would look like. does it make sense for me to get my expectations in order before making the appointment?.. or should i just jump in?
I feel like this the blind leading the blind. But I settled on trying to push for a psych evaluation instead of jumping into sessions. I’ve also been journaling my mental state and sleep daily, so I can be prepared this time. Roughest thing I did was physically writing out my past trauma/history, but figured I’d have that on hand too so I had a checklist of things I can remember to talk about. Maybe disconnect it when I talk about it.
Figure with all that at least I can get a baseline opinion out of it and if I don’t like the person this time I have some actionable items I can plug in for people that specialize in what might crop up.
My issues though are not clear so I’m just struggling to find the right path. I hope you keep at it, just as much as I do.
this is excellent advice. my immediate response to it is, of course, to cringe and shy away. but i admit that a bit of journaling would raise my confidence level a lot.
Oh it’s not easy, I keep stopping and forcing myself to restart. But it’s been invaluable, because when I look back I realized how shitty my memory is. Half of the things I put in there I wouldn’t remember if I didn’t write them down.
I’ve been using an app called eMoods if it helps.
i have decided to call in the morning and find out what their scheduling looks like for the next couple of months, and also what prescribing looks like if we want to go that route.
those two pieces of information, and also simply making contact, will help me get my mind right about it.
I’m sorry you are going through that. If you’re unaware psychologytoday.com is a great resource. They let you search based on insurance, specialties, in person/virtual, any preferences one might have, and the professionals also might include info about them maybe even a video. I hope you get the help you have been fighting for soon.
Thanks, I have gone there and it was helpful.
I made the mistake the first time by just taking my family doctor’s opinion because I’m newer to the area and have no idea where to start. He sent me to the group who had asshole #1 and I found out afterwards that guy had a lot negative reviews for the same issues I had. The group was ok, but he was the worst and I got placed with him because everyone else was full. I was ignorant and was just desperate to get “somewhere”. Boy was that a mistake.
Bigger problem I’m finding is there is a very small list for my area. Once I popped in the filter for non-secular it gets barren. I live in a very religious area, I’m not anti-religion. But I am an atheist that doesn’t want to go to someone who tells me to confide in God to heal myself. Been to one of those before, just doesn’t work.
Essentially I have narrowed it down to two.
Even as someone who’s religious, I’m not going to pay a therapist what a priest will tell me whether or not I pay. (This is pretending my religion would even have therapists peddling it as though this wasn’t just an extremely Christian thing).