I’m still coming to grips with this being part of being on the spectrum and I’ve felt this all my life. Only recently got daliagnosed.
For a long, long time, I just marked it up as me being “brutally honest” when I realized I can’t even say white lies to save people from hurt feelings or whatever. It’s a whole nother world realizing how frustrating existing has been trying to wade through what people are actually saying.
Bro saaame about always being called “brutally honest”
Like for instance someone asking what you think of their cooking. I’m a cook. So I’m gonna give my honest opinion and even point out where it can be made better or if made a mistake they might not realize is a mistake in the first place. This is what I would want someone to do if I asked the question.
But no you’re apparently supposed to just say “its really good thanks for making it!” and that just boggles my mind to no end.
Oh my fucking god. And the same person who says it’s really good will have no trouble talking about how shit it was when the person who made it isn’t around
But no you’re apparently supposed to just say “its really good thanks for making it!” and that just boggles my mind to no end.
What no you are gaslighting them.
I wouldn’t use the word ‘mistake’ unless I’m admitting something I’ve done was unintentional. When it’s someone else, I just point out “Most restaurants do it this way instead, because X, or Doing Y makes your dish more Z”
Right? It’s totally gaslighting what we are expected to say just out of “politeness”
But mistake and a difference of technique are two completely different things. It is mind boggling that saying something is a mistake is considered rude.
I’ve been told “people can change their mind” more times than I can count
Fuck me for expecting people to say what they mean, right?
I’m still coming to grips with this being part of being on the spectrum and I’ve felt this all my life. Only recently got daliagnosed.
For a long, long time, I just marked it up as me being “brutally honest” when I realized I can’t even say white lies to save people from hurt feelings or whatever. It’s a whole nother world realizing how frustrating existing has been trying to wade through what people are actually saying.
Bro saaame about always being called “brutally honest”
Like for instance someone asking what you think of their cooking. I’m a cook. So I’m gonna give my honest opinion and even point out where it can be made better or if made a mistake they might not realize is a mistake in the first place. This is what I would want someone to do if I asked the question.
But no you’re apparently supposed to just say “its really good thanks for making it!” and that just boggles my mind to no end.
Oh my fucking god. And the same person who says it’s really good will have no trouble talking about how shit it was when the person who made it isn’t around
And that person was just “being nice” not lying
What no you are gaslighting them.
I wouldn’t use the word ‘mistake’ unless I’m admitting something I’ve done was unintentional. When it’s someone else, I just point out “Most restaurants do it this way instead, because X, or Doing Y makes your dish more Z”
Right? It’s totally gaslighting what we are expected to say just out of “politeness”
But mistake and a difference of technique are two completely different things. It is mind boggling that saying something is a mistake is considered rude.
“You fucked up” vs “The pros do it differently but it reminds me of them because otherwise why would I bring it up”