• NoRun1294@alien.topB
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    1 year ago

    This headline was written in the style of the doctor from Arrested Development.

    Headline: “They did all we could to save him.”

    Article: And they did.

    • Quirky-Lawyer-3409@alien.topB
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      1 year ago

      “It looks like he’s dead.”

      “Wait a minute. Is he actually dead or just looks like it.”

      “Just looks like it. He’s got blue paint on him or something.”

    • Flat_News_2000@alien.topB
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      1 year ago

      “Your brother is all right.”

      “Oh thank god…”

      “A seal bit off his left hand, so he’s all right now.”

      “YOU SON OF A BITCH”

  • ThomasMarkov@alien.top
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    1 year ago

    I studied math in grad school and was trying to figure out wtf Bernhard Riemann, a German mathematician in the 1800s, had to with football. It is, in fact, impossible for him to play for the colts today.