I’ve always been a fencesitter when it comes to having kids. I’m getting to a point where I think I’d like to have a kid. I don’t know if it’s because I really want one, or there’s just nothing major left on the list of life accomplishments and it’s a societal expectation.

The thing is, I can think of a million and one reasons not to have one and can’t put into words why I would want one. However, I’m starting to have a nagging feeling that I want to start trying. I just don’t know if that feeling is something I actually want, or just society telling me I should.

It doesn’t help that I don’t have a lot of small children I regularly interact with, so I honestly don’t have a clue what life would look like after kids, beyond it being a lot of stress and hard work. It also doesn’t help my spouse says it’s my choice and they’ll go along with whatever I want .

Any advice or things that helped you know it was the right choice/time for you to expand your family?

  • TORFdot0@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    I had kids early because I still wanted to still be in my 40s, by the time we had an empty nest. Financially we were able to handle it, but you aren’t ever really ready, it’s just not something you can prepare for. The way you think your life is gonna go after kids, is never really close to the way it actually ends up after kids. Your perspective and priorities completely change

    • BeardedGingerWonder@feddit.uk
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      7 months ago

      Also you get to laugh at people who a) are about to have kids and think they have everything sussed and b) people who have just had kids for the first time and haven’t fully realised the enormity of what’s about to hit them.