• SasquatchBanana@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      Bro. You don’t ask this to random people. You need to build rapport. I have plenty of times vibed with people and then told them i got the hots for them and then we did the deed. It ain’t too hard. Just be clear and upfront and make some vibe checks.

    • theangryseal@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      I want to have fuck with you.

      For real though, a friend of mine recently (August) walked into a gas station and asked the girl working there if she was married. She said yes. He said, “You the type keep a man on the side?”

      The next day he was in handcuffs. He’s a strange dude and he says things to women that I don’t think he should, so naturally, I doubted him.

      He was charged with stalking, trespassing after being forbidden, and assault.

      His lawyer managed to get the video from the store and the body cam video from the officer who responded. He brought the USB drive by a few days ago after the charges were dismissed so I could see the video. He doesn’t want his friends to think he’s a piece of shit.

      I watched it. He said exactly what I said above and told her to have a good day, turned back around to say, “Good on you for being faithful. You ever get sick of him, remember me.” Was it nasty to say that? Absolutely. A crime? Absolutely not.

      The body cam video was the most interesting part. The woman said, “He came in here and told me outright that he wanted to fuck me. I told him I was married and I figured that would be the end of it, just like with other creepy men. I asked him to please not come here while I’m working.” The cop interrupts, “Well that’s trespassing right there. I’ll git eem fer that too.” She continued, “Well, he had a massive erection and he stood here playing with it through his shorts. He wanted me to see it. He came over beside the counter and kind of stepped behind where I was at.” Cop interrupts again, “Ok so he actually came behind the counter?” “Not fully, but he did step back there about a step or two.” She replied. Cop says, “well ‘ats assault right there. I can charge em with that too. So did he take his penis out where you could see it? I’d like to charge him with indecent exposure too but unless you seen his penis, like, the flesh, I cain’t do that. I’m gonna git eem with stalkin’ too though.” She replied, “Well no, I didn’t see his actual penis, but he stood there rubbing it through his shorts and motioning his head for me to look at it. It was a big old boner. I was scared to death. He kept saying, “you know I can give it to you good, won’t you walk in the women’s bathroom with me.” and stuff like that. I called my husband and he came out here. When the guy came back a third time he walked in and walked right back out when he seen my husband.”

      On the video he walked in, said, “Well, damn. I left my wallet at home. I’ll be right back.” Her husband said, “no, you won’t be right back. You ain’t welcome in here anymore.” He paused for a second and looked at him dumbfounded and said, “Well, alright. This ain’t the only gas station in town. Bye then.”

      I watched the video from the gas station. None of it happened. Everything she said was pure fantasy. I spent from August until a few days ago thinking he was a total fucking creep. I can’t believe he was charged at all and I can’t believe the girl didn’t back out when the manager offered to get the video for the police. Oh, and the assault charge. He stepped behind the counter to reach over and grab a paper towel to clean coffee he spilled. He has been stopping there for 20 years and didn’t think it would be a problem.

      She also said he didn’t pay for his coffee on the video so I’m surprised officer Doofy didn’t charge him with shoplifting too.

      Us men gotta be careful. For real.

      Women too, because assholes like the one she described to the officer do exist and women contend with them daily. Lying, dangerous women also exist too.

      I’d be afraid to hit on a total stranger. I wouldn’t want to anyway because that’s not the type of person I am. If I were though, I’d be too afraid to do it. Every woman I’ve ever been with said something to me first. I never wanted to come off as a creep and I like women who assert themselves anyway.

      Fortunately there was video and the charges were dropped.

      • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        Yes, women can lie. So can anyone. And I mean… we don’t know you either and we’re supposed to take your word for it. As far as I know this is a story online. Anyone can lie to sway an opinion the way they want it. Wouldn’t be the first. Won’t be the last.

        • AbsoluteChicagoDog@lemm.ee
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          10 months ago

          It correlates with my experience. I’ve had the police called on me for simply existing in a public park as a man.

          I also find it interesting how willing you are to call a man a liar when he shares his struggles. Would you do the same if the genders were reversed?

          • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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            10 months ago

            As I already said and started with: yes women can lie. So can anyone. I find it interesting It’s been repeated to you now. Once was not enough for you.

            • ripcord@lemmy.world
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              10 months ago

              You know, it is possible to acknowledge that there are some areas where men do tend to have it worse than women. Or at least have significant problems that should be acknowledged. It’s ok to do that

              We shoukd it find to do that for both sexes.

              • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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                10 months ago

                I don’t disagree that men face issues. But That’s not what this discussion is. I don’t agree that we be reactionary or cram a bunch of bullshit and sensationalism into the topic.

                Issues should be fixed but also based on real issues. Not based on anecdotes some rando dogwhistling online to get reactionaries to crawl out of the woodwork. That debases the topics.

                It is a possible story. But as far as we take that as something to act on, we have to remind ourselves this is what someone posts on the internet. this might as well be treated as something you copypasta from nosleep on Reddit.

                There are real stories. There are sides to the story. And there are truths. This is a story. At best it could be argued it’s a side to a story. But as far as I know: it’s just as much a truth as not a truth.

                Take the emotion you have of the woman lying in this story. Now apply it to the OP. Cuz it has contains as much fact to go by on as far as we know is a fictional story or strongly one sided about what actually happened.

                If you want to discuss issues for real, it can’t just be based on having a pitchfork out on a fictional story. Cuz you’d not let that woman in the story get away with it. You shouldn’t get away with it either.

              • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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                10 months ago

                I assume bad actors trying to convince others they are ‘having a discussion’ are nothing better than a trolllolollollo. You’re a troll. Enjoy my block list.

        • snake_case_guy@lemmynsfw.com
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          10 months ago

          If not a true story, at least it has a moral: Don’t judge anyone until all the facts have been laid out. And not just what each person say, the fucking facts, like video tapes. Or, if you are a God fearing citizen, as Jesus H. Christ said: Don’t judge others until you have your fucking facts right. Or something on that line.

        • endhits@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          The difference is that with women lie they ruin a man’s life, or at least try to.

          • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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            10 months ago

            Men’s life are not the only lives that matter. So no, there is no difference in gender when it comes to lying to destroy someone’s life. You’re being sexist.

      • 𝕯𝖎𝖕𝖘𝖍𝖎𝖙@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        Us men gotta be careful

        I agree. Specifically though I think men need to be careful about who they flirt with and in what contexts. Flirting with people at their job should never be considered. Best case, you annoy her. Worst case, well… you explained one example. Either way, it’s generally wise not to annoy the people you want to hook up with.

        • theneverfox@pawb.social
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          10 months ago

          Nah, you take your shot (without being inappropriate) then you accept the answer gracefully.

          This guy did a three in one - she clearly went way, way beyond acceptable responses, but forcing out a straight “no” makes women uncomfortable.

          When she says “I have a boyfriend” or “I’m gay” or whatever, it may be the reason she’s saying no or she might just be lying to spare your pride and avoid a bad reaction. An excuse is definitely a “no” though

          You get one shot. If you’re the type who needs a clear answer, ask a clear question the first time

          • 𝕯𝖎𝖕𝖘𝖍𝖎𝖙@lemmy.world
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            10 months ago

            You don’t write the rules, buddy. And at that rate, you might find yourself on the other side of rules you didn’t think existed.

            This may surprise you, but the world is not fair.

      • gandalf_der_12te@feddit.de
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        10 months ago

        Like, actually, the same thing (or similar) happened to me.

        I sit in classroom, other girl walks in, I say hi (from 5 feet away). Nothing else.

        She turns away in disgust and seems to be angry for some reason.

        Ok, I decide, let her cool down a bit.

        Talk to her an hour later. To do so, I approach her to 3 feet or sth. Anyways, she looks at me in disgust and is about to turn to her friend, complaining. I say “what’s wrong?”. She replies with “nothing”, cynical.

        So sad. Like, what’s going on.

    • frezik
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      10 months ago

      I did something like that once, but it was at a gangbang. Men can do it in certain contexts where some level of sexual activity is expected.