Gay_Wrath [fae/faer]

vegan btw

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Joined 4 years ago
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Cake day: July 29th, 2020

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  • this might be terrible advice. Maybe since you have PTSD you are dealing with your body going into freeze mode when threatened, but you really need to get more fight mode. Practicing hitting for real and sparring will definitely help condition you to automatically respond when threatened, i have experienced this when i’ve been forced to self defend. It is automatic now.

    I think just build up to making it feel safe to spar and feel angry. I feel like when i was stuck in feeling frozen from PTSD, i wouldn’t even let myself feel anger because it was too dangerous for me, so maybe you’re in the same place? Yeesh i’m terrible at this.

    If you can’t imagine hurting them over self-defense, maybe try imagining hurting them over some imagined defense of others. When sparring, as long as you’ve got safety equipment on, you’re good to go. it’s great practice for learning. If it’s too real to think of it as real self defense, just think of it as a fun game like fencing to get yourself into it, that lets your body learn how to move and gets your brain time to warm up to the idea of actually hurting another person.

    You could try reading some black panther’s theory about self defense and seeing if any sticks with you into why it’s good actually to be ready to hit back. I’m kicking myself because i don’t remember exactly the title i’m thinking of, but Black Against Empire is great, or maybe it was Against Civility. thonk There’s also a citations needed about nonviolence somewhere, i’m sure it’s in the podcasts directory or here’s the transcript.

    Anyway, here’s “In defense of self defense” by comrade Huey Newton

    “the oppressor has no rights that the oppressed is bound to respect. Kill the slavemaster, destroy him utterly, move against him with implacable fortitude. Break his oppressive power by any means necessary.”