MyEyeballStings [none/use name]

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Joined 2 months ago
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Cake day: September 13th, 2024

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  • Actually, I should take this more seriously. So, I have an extremely deeply-rooted fear, and tbh also kind of resentment, over the experience of being persistently socially ostracized & isolated for all of my childhood, and much of my adulthood. This is itself basically a function of me being autistic, and having been placed in special education from a very young age. I’ve always understood myself to be distinct from, and in a sense, less capable than everybody else around me.

    Today, this kind of manifests in a way as an obsession over trying to find romantic, and sexual successes (of which I have of course had none). This is because of a number of factors, but probably one of the biggest ones is age. I’m in my early/mid-thirties now, and it’s difficult to do anything except hang around discord chat groups (which I also don’t really do, because I’m terminally asocial), because pretty much anyone in my age-range IRL is going to be involved with their own families.

    I have nieces, and a sister that I hang out with a lot, and I do like them; and apparently I am their favorite uncle, but also I don’t really like being relegated to having basically the same social role as the robot from Big Hero Six.

    It’s all very frustrating.





  • I mean, “Nature” is a dialectic all in itself. It is at once both the ultimate origin of the human species, and everything with which we sustain & furnish ourselves; and at the same time it is the origin of every disease that would harm us, and of every condition & necessity that allows for one person to hold dominion over & abuse another. For that reason, it would be unwise not to attempt to make ourselves the masters of it.

    But I would disagree that there is a “dialectic” between the “natural”, and the “unnatural”. That’s a position born either out of theology, or of pastoral romanticism. Instead one might say that there is a dialectic between those things which are the product of human society distinctly, and those things which are not, but both are in fact contained within the broader scope of the Natural.