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Cake day: June 26th, 2023

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  • get_the_reference_toPolitical Memes@lemmy.worldAged like milk
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    5 months ago

    “It takes more than that to kill a bull moose,” the wounded candidate assured them. He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a bullet-riddled, 50-page speech. Holding up his prepared remarks, which had two big holes blown through each page, Roosevelt continued. “Fortunately I had my manuscript, so you see I was going to make a long speech, and there is a bullet—there is where the bullet went through—and it probably saved me from it going into my heart. The bullet is in me now, so I cannot make a very long speech, but I will try my best.”


  • get_the_reference_toMemes@lemmy.mlplease
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    5 months ago

    To paraphrase Office Space:

    Let me ask you something. Where you work, does anyone ever tell you to “think different?”

    No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you’d get your ass kicked sayin’ something like that, man.