There’s still time

Aw man I just spieled on mein glock

Yeah, Norton’s dog has historically been a dick

If you can dodge a draft, you can dodge a ball

Put down a towel

The movie 1917 is my go to for sound.

Apple TV+’s nature show Earthsounds blew me away (though try to ignore how many times they say the word “acoustic” in each episode).

8 years ago dude

DJT, ACB, KBJ, HRC, RBG to name a few

Ah yes, who could forget president GRFJ?

I don’t know if you’re being purposefully dense or just ignorant but there’s definitely an uptick in politicians and public figures being referred to by their initials in the media for the last 20 years.

Of fucking course I realize it’s not the first time in history it’s been done.

Dude he asked why it was so prevalent now.

No shit. He asked why it was so prevalent now.

My guess is back when Twitter had the 160 character cap

I thought he sounded like Foghorn Leghorn

Oh lord. Better not show her then.

How the hell was he already 12 when he was born?

To be fair, so does digital media/streaming

I know. But I can promise you, it isn’t.

Why?

So this one is a doozy, and I still have trouble believing this happened to me.

My ex was cheating on me. I confirmed it by checking her phones location (yeah I know, shitty thing to do but there were LOADS of red flags and we were each other’s first everything). I decided I was going to confront her at her fuck buddies house. I drove an hour to get there. I was about to turn into the subdivision, and for some reason just had a feeling that I should stop. Once I did, I realized it was stupid to do this. I knew she was cheating, so what sense was there to confront her?

So I turned around and started to head back home when I realized that there was a huge jacked up truck RIGHT on my ass. It was the guy she was cheating on me with. Turns out, it was a college professor for a class we were both in (this was a long time ago).

So I’m driving along, and this guy starts to try to run me off the road, so I start speeding up. He’s trying to get alongside me to ram me. I’m freaking the FUCK out. I’m doing probably 110 mph down a winding back road that I had never been on. No GPS and barely any cell service. I remember calling my mom, and telling her I was going to die. I’ll never forget that. She tells me to hang up and call the cops. I call 911 and give them the rundown, or at least I try to, but I lose signal. It’s at that moment when I see this dude pull a pistol and aim it at my car from his window. He starts firing at me. I miraculously get cell signal again and call the cops. I tell them the road and mile marker that I’m on, and they tell me they’ll have 2 cops posted up ahead and to stop there.

I stop by the cops and they RIP me out of the car and throw me on the ground and handcuff me. Screaming at me asking where the gun is. I tell them that I didn’t have the gun, it was the guy that just flew by them doing 120mph.

It was at that moment that they tell me to stay on the ground and THEY BOTH GET IN THEIR CARS TO CHASE HIM. I’M STILL FUCKING HANDCUFFED, and now, all alone.

They come back and said that they couldn’t catch up to him, but he had told them he had me on camera breaking into his house (how did they speak to him if they didn’t catch up to him ???). I tell them to take me to jail then and have him prove it with the video. They ask me what I was doing in this small town, and I tell them the truth.

They ask to call my soon to be ex so they could speak to her. I gave them her number and they called her and put her on speaker. THIS GIRL TELLS THEM SHES NEVER EVEN MET ME! We’d been together for 4 years!

They tell me to just leave, and that I wasn’t welcome back into the town.

6 months later my dad gets a job in that town and we moved there. Luckily I moved out right after.

You gotta try Spicy Pickle Monster by Prairie