On accident
I kind of can’t take people seriously when they say On accident, I don’t know or care if its more or less grammatical, it sounds like a child sputtering in my mind. It should be By accident or accidentally
Tummy
Any adult has zero business saying this lol
This wording is troubling, and suggests that maybe you believe in the catharsis model of anger?
That’s where you believe that anger is “stored” somewhere and “builds up” over time, and must be let out in some “healthy” way later. The problem is, there is no healthy way to express deferred anger.
If you allow yourself some visceral reward for getting angry and fixating on that anger, what you’re doing is training your brain to look for excuses to become angry and stay angry, so that you can get that dopamine hit of “blowing off steam”. It feels like it works, cuz it feels good. But it creates a link between getting angry and feeling good.
Pay attention to whether you have structures in place which are rewarding you for getting angry, and try to replace them with less rewarding, less stimulating responses.
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Right on, friend. Take care. And I’m sorry you’re getting kind of a rough response to being so vulnerable here.
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