Or in other words, do you wish you were born “fitting in” to the society we live in? Why or why not?
This might be a divisive question so please remember to be civil and respectful.
I believe we should all be proud of our trans identities and how they help make up the beautiful complex people we are, but with rising transphobia around the world, we’ve been pressured to hide this aspect of ourselves and even feel shame or internalized transphobia. It’s important to keep in mind that transphobia and bigotry are learned traits. Not something people are born with. Our society as well as influential people in our lives shape these viewpoints out of fear and lack of understanding.
I think this is why so many of us that fall under a binary trans umbrella (including myself) are overly concerned with passing in public. Or “presenting as cis” vs being comfortable with where we are in our process.
Does being concerned with passing mean we wish we were cis? Or is it more of a self defense we have developed to keep ourselves safe even if that means going “stealth” and hiding big aspects of our identity?
What are your thoughts? Do you wish you were cis instead of trans? Why is that?
**EDIT: When writing and thinking about this post, I did not fully consider how different perspectives may view this question. I wrote it using my own experience as a mostly binary trans woman and in turn it excludes a lot of non-binary perspectives.
I apologize for excluding any of our wonderful transiblings from discussion. I’ll keep this in mind moving forward and love each and every one of you!
All the love, -Olivia**
I don’t wish that I were cis, but I do wish that I went through the right puberty. I don’t think that my childhood would change at all really had I been cis. I had best friends of all genders and played with whatever toys I wanted, whether it was Barbie or Lego. Where things really started sucking and I feel like I lost out a ton of life experience in general was going through my absolutely agonizing puberty. I became very isolated and depressed and have been coping ever since.
A huge part of my desire to pass is for safety. At the present moment, if I lived in a society that was completely accepting of trans people I’d say it wouldn’t matter nearly as much to me.