Hello all. I wanted to make this post because I feel like venting a bit. I know the “cure” to my problem is CBT or exposure therapy, but I was hoping to speak to like-minded people or anybody who feels like sharing their thoughts.
I hate that I’m not able to enjoy summer like most others. I hate that I flinch at the very sound of buzzing or the sight of flying insects. I know that it’s an irrational fear, I know it’s not normal and I know I look stupid when I cover my ears or flee into my room whenever I see or hear an insect. I’ve been told “they can’t hurt you, they’re nothing” so many times and I know they can’t hurt me but why is there minimal understanding of this phobia? I hate that whenever I tell people about this, I’m mostly met with “yeah they’re disgusting I hate them too”; it’s not that I find them disgusting, it’s that they cause me heart-pumping palm-sweating fear. It’s that I can’t enjoy landscapes and being out in the country like regular folks, I’m always alert and on the watch whenever I’m on an excursion because the fear and anxiety is so greatly installed in me. It’s that I sometimes end up hallucinating the buzzing sounds that jerks me awake.
This definitely sounds like self-pity, and honestly it is. Because sometimes you just feel sorry for yourself and today is that day for me. I hope I can enjoy this summer despite these creatures. I hope I can speak to people who suffer from the same phobia, or people with any degree of empathy at all.
On the bright side, humanity is killing insects through climate change!
On the bright side if we continue on the path we’re on you won’t have to worry about flying insects!
Side note, but if you move to an urban or arid region, the insect populations drop off hugely. Combine the two in a place like, say, Phoenix, Arizona, and you can almost completely avoid them. You would be exchanging them for furnace-like summer temps though.
From your description it sounds like the noise is the part that gives you the most anxiety. Would some noise cancelling earbuds help maybe? I’m sorry I don’t know enough about this type of phobia to give better advice.
I used to have a mild phobia of insects, and honestly, exposure is what worked for me. It was natural exposure, just being outside when the weather is nice and trying my best not to freak out at first led to slow (over years) progress. I still don’t like bugs, but they don’t bother me now except for wasps…
Good luck, I hope it gets better for you.
I’m sorry you have to deal with that, it sounds awful.
I have not suffered from insect-phobia myself, but I HAVE dealt with some other phobias. I think the thing that helped me is specifically understanding what it is that scares you about insects, and try exposure slowly.
For example, if you’re afraid of wasps, but not afraid of, say ladybugs; what is the difference in your mind? Is it flying bugs? Crawling bugs? Is it legs?
Once you break that down, expose yourself to a bug that scares you the least, and over time you may find that “scary” feature isn’t so big.
Fwiw, I used to be phobic of any fast flying insect until I could confirm it wasn’t a bee, wasp, or similar stinging insect because that’s how phobic I was of stinging insects.
That heart pounding, sweaty fear reaction is totally relatable to me.
And it was exposure that helped me get to the point where my reaction to the fear is within rational boundaries. Since I’m allergic to the damn things, the fear itself is not only rational, but a safety measure. That’s how the phobia got started as a kid; I’d get stung, have a lot of pain, then start the process of anaphylaxis. Kind of etches fear into any creatures bee-like lol.
But, after an event as a young adult, where I literally ran away from a bumble bee and left my patient that I was there to take care without support, I had to get a handle on things. Fwiw, the patient was fine, noting bad happened because of me abandoning him, but it could have been very bad.
It took maybe a year of exposure to get to the point where I could not feel my butthole pucker at a buzzing sound, much less see a bee and freak out. But I got there.
And once you get to the point where the phobia is controlled, it lasts. The exposures were back in the nineties, and just yesterday a bumblebee was circling me while I was taking care of the chickens, and there was only a split second of fear. I know that bumbles aren’t aggressive, so I could just stay there and appreciate the beauty of it while I worked.
Had that been a wasp or hornet I would have left the area as a safety measure, and would have done so pretty dam fast, and with fear, but I wouldn’t have done anything absurd in the process, I would have had control. And that’s why exposure therapy is worth the discomfort along the way, that ability to now control how you react to the fear.
No shit, I used to freak out at pictures or video of bees, but I genuinely find them cute now. Wasps and hornets can fuck right off, but I can appreciate their beauty in pictures now, and that’s an awesome thing in the literal sense of awesome where it amazes me at the change possible in the human mind.
Just so you know, the bumblebee was mapping you. Strange tall object where there wasn’t one yesterday. Quick lap to confirm and off they go.
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Sorry to hear, I hope you won’t suffer to much this summer…
I get ya. I decide what to wear in the morning based on the temp that day and which colors might attract wasps (if it’s warm enough for them to be out). Heaven forbid a butterfly sneak up on me while I’m out, because I’m gonna momentarily lose my shit.
I’m with you on your rant, although I’ve made peace with me not being an outdoors person because of bugs. “Why not sit with us in the grass?” Hell no, I say.
Too bad for me, we also had a very wet winter and that causes bugs to come up my pipes. I missed nights of sleep over going to the kitchen and finding a “water bug” had come up to visit. No season is safe around here.
Anyway, don’t feel too bad. I think it’s ok and acceptable to have the fear and to let that just be who you are.
I know the “cure” to my problem is CBT or exposure therapy
This could work, does for a lot of people. It it doesn’t you could also consider some humanistic therapy, rather than focusing on the things that set you off, it’s help with how you experience the feelings.
Meaning that rather than being overwhelmed by the reaction you could see the insect, feel your reaction and be okay with it.
Think of it like CBT seeks to stop the first domino from being knocked over. Humanistic therapy would stop the dominos from running away after the first one or two.
When I was maybe 6 years old, I stepped on a ground wasp nest. For most of the rest of my childhood I had an intense phobia of flying bugs as a result. All flying bugs were out to get me, and any stinging insects were going to sting me for sure, never mind if they were halfway across the yard. The slightest sound of insect wings nearby was enough to send me into a panic.
Then, one day, I was outside and nearly bumped into a wasp I didn’t see. I yelped and jumped back—and the wasp jumped back too, like it was just as surprised and scared as I was, then flew away from me as fast as it could.
And I suddenly realized that maybe they were just as afraid of me as I was of them.
I won’t say my phobia disappeared overnight, but from that day forward it faded pretty quickly. Now I can be right next to bees and wasps and be fine with it.
What’s weird is I’d been told the whole ‘they’re more afraid of you than you are of them’ business before, but somehow seeing it like that made that statement real.
