I’ve been admittedly struggling with my identity as a whole, especially as I approach my 1 year mark on Estrogen. So far it’s the right call for me, but I’ve discovered that I’m becoming more comfortable with my masculine traits and even find myself binding my breasts that I’ve waited so many years to have, while the next day I’ll do the complete opposite and present femininely.
I feel like I have no consistent sense of self and often have a hard time even knowing what’s going on in my head haha
Constantly trying to figure out if I’m a boy, girl, both, or neither, because I admittedly struggle with my body in various fronts. One day I’m too feminine, the next I look too much like a man, or I’m not androgynous enough.
Frankly, it’s exhausting. I used to think I was just a woman but it doesn’t seem to fit as I continue hrt.
It feels odd to express all of this but, I’ve not really talked to many trans people as I’m chronically shy. Is there anyone who can relate to what I’m going through?
i began having similar thoughts/feelings once i began feeling more comfortable with my body due to HRT. like others have said here, you shouldn’t feel pressured to place yourself in one box or another and you should instead use this time to really explore everything you can about gender. just see where you land and follow your feelings.
it may even come to pass that, like me, you find that you can’t identify as only one thing. over the last three years i’ve gone from coming out as non-binary tranfem, to identifying fully as a woman, to now having an understanding that i’m polygenderflux and i feel varying degrees of certain genders. and guess what, some of those genders i made up, they’re mine; because gender isn’t real (?) 🤷♀️ you can kind of just… be you.