Blahaj.zone admin note - I’m leaving your post rather than removing it, so that my reply expanding on why your position is an issue has context. Please note, this is not a discussion or a debate. Any further gatekeeping of other folks identity will be removed, as per our instance policies

What you’re describing is still gatekeeping. Not everyone experiences asexuality the way you do, and you are guilty of doing the very thing you’re claiming others are doing to you.

There are terms that describe what you’re talking about that have space in the ace community. Sex repulsed, sex positive, sex indifferent all describe different experiences of asexuality, and in ace communities or broader queer communities, you can quite easily say that you’re looking to connect/share experiences with other sex repulsed/indifferent ace folk, and no one is going to have an issue with it.

It becomes an issue when you say or imply that ace folk who don’t share your experiences aren’t really ace, or claim that they’re invading your space, as if you have more right to it than them. At that point you’re gatekeeping, and trying to deny them access to a space with folk who share their experiences.

Nearly everything you’ve described is perfectly normal for both women and men, cis and trans.

I’m a trans woman. I don’t really get femininity. I don’t wear makeup, I don’t have my ears pierced. I didn’t have any desire to play around with gender non conforming clothes before I transitioned.

There is no such thing as a preference or behaviour that will tell you if you’re trans or not.

What tells you if you’re trans, is who you are underneath all of that!

I got a rush of happiness when she referred to me with she/her pronouns

That one is pretty unusual for most men and it’s worth exploring, because it’s the part of your comment most closely tied with your sense of identity and your sense of self.

And remember, you don’t need answers right away. You don’t even need labels. All you need is to give yourself permission to explore what works for you, and to help you understand yourself more.

Defederated. If they start federating outwards, I’ll lift it

If you’re concerned, you can put a content warning in the subject line, and that way, people can choose whether or not to engage with it.

The community is here for you! Don’t be afraid to use it

My time limit is about two hours. Anything more than that and I start getting bored, distracted and twitchy

I can’t say that I agree with a lot of the article.

I’m a binary trans woman. The only of that that tells you my gender identity is “woman”. I’m binary and I’m trans, but neither of those are gender identities, they are simply ways of telling people more about my gender identity.

Additionally, I’d argue that gender identity isn’t comparable to a style or sexual preference There are gender non conforming, asexual binary folk, and there are allosexual, gender conforming binary folk. All of those folk are binary, but there is no overlap in sexual preference or style.

And in the same way, for many folk, non binary isn’t a gender identity either. It’s a label that tells you what their gender identity isn’t, but that doesn’t automatically tell you what it is.

But ultimately, I think we’re in agreement on the overall point. Nonbinary is a starting point to understanding someones identity, not the end. There is an infinite world of possibility that all gets wrapped up in to that term!

This instance is an accident. Kaity created it for me to play with, when lemmy was barely a thing, before hexbear was federating and before the reddit exodus happened.

And then when the reddit exodus happened, we had something like five active users, but still, as the only queer instance that was federating with the rest of lemmy we got a huge influx of people. And suddenly, instead of being a single person instance, we had become a community almost overnight.

Which, as an aside, means we’ve been around for longer than the vast majority of lemmy instances.

Our history is far more boring than your version.

It’s a public group, with content produced by community members, of which you are one.

If you see coverage missing, post it rather than complaining about the fact no one else has done the thing you haven’t done either

when on voice or the phone?

That’s it. Those are my pet peeves

I guess it means oldest wild bird? Captive parrots can sometimes live beyond 100!

I don’t know, because my parents were irreligious too. My dad was an atheist, and my mum is agnostic. She has some spiritual beliefs, but has no religious beliefs or belief in deities.

I’m not sure I’d describe this graph as beautiful in any sense :\

Let me guess, you just watched The Diplomat? :)

There is no space on this instance or its communities for “allies” who think the tone of queer folks comics is the real issue that needs to be talked about

At a guess, I’d say it’s confirmation bias

Wow, this thread had me bringing out the ban hammer a lot!

deleted by creator

Hopefully me banning will get that message across

Image noise. For photography

Neat image is the one I use because it’s the only one that works. It’s not my first choice though