Edit I’m just gonna delete this soon. I posted it and made most of my comments while angry and looking for blood. yea a lot of cringe stuff got said on that post but I don’t think my post is contributing anything to the sub other than anger, and possibly driving people away. Sorry to the people I snapped at, I hope yall have a good night🐕

The comments are full of people saying transphobic shit and op doubling down on his “making your trans partner feel dysphoric is fine” shit. He’ll that pic was a re-upload from one of the mods here. What the fuck!!! This is fucking 196 why are we out here defending blatant transphobia? People are in there calling trans people karens with a persecution complex, there’s tons of defense of treating trans men like shit, “allies” telling trans people they’re overreacting, all kinds of inexcusable shit. If this is how lemmy 196 is gonna be I hope this place crashes and burns

  • EndlessApollo@lemmy.worldOP
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    1 year ago

    Pick me !!! Pick me!!! Hey I’m one of the good transes pick me!!!

    If you didn’t see the shit in that comments you weren’t looking hard enough. Op openly admitting their abusive tendencies and lots of people saying that’s OK, that trying to make a trans partner feel dysphoric is just a"preference ". Fuck off with your internalized transphobia, assuming you even are trans and not just some 14 yo 4chan edgelord who wants to own the transes or whatever

    • Lemdee@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I had the first comment in that post, I saw every comment thereafter. You’re making shit up about what happened in those comments. Or I guess that’s just how your warped view of reality interpreted it. Yikes.

      I used to be like you, angry at the world and blaming everyone but myself. I hope you come to terms with your anger and learn to process that instead of lashing out at others like you’re doing. Meditation helped me, best of luck.

      • EndlessApollo@lemmy.worldOP
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        And I hope you deal with your internalized transphobia. We need to stick together, not gang up on eachother to look good for The Cis™. Stop defending blatantly transphobic bullshit (or pretending it doesn’t even exist in your case)

        • Lemdee@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Who’s ganging up on you? If anything you’re the one ganging up by trying to flame the person in the screenshot for answering what their sexual preference is when someone asked them.

          There was nothing that was “blatantly transphobic” other than the Karen comment that rightfully had several rebuttals shutting it down.

          I don’t stick with people just because of characteristics we share. They have to be a good person for me to want to support and be with them. You are not that, so I will not defend you just because we’re both trans. Trans people can suck too, as you’ve shown.

          • flicker@kbin.social
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            1 year ago

            @Dee

            I think that your impression that this user wants to be angry is correct, because the person they were mad at for being insensitive in their wording appeared in this very thread an hour ago and made themselves available to speak to the person calling you a Pick Me and being rude, but the user chose to continue arguing with you, rather than address the (IMO, reasonable) response of the original ‘offender.’

            I agree that the wording was insensitive but when the user in question clarified their POV, as far as I can tell, they were still being reasonable. It’s telling that the OP chose to continue to attack you further rather than engage with the original ‘offender.’

            I don’t think further engagement here will be beneficial to you, or the OP, though obviously you’re free to do as you wish. I hope you have a lovely day.

            • Lemdee@lemmy.world
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              You’re absolutely right, I guess I just wanted to inject some sanity into this mess. But I’m running into Brandolini’s Law over and over again. If these people want to be angry I guess I should let them. I hope you have a lovely day as well. Thanks for the virtual hand on the shoulder haha

          • Good Girl [she/they]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            1 year ago

            I’m sure when a cis guy murders another trans person under the “trans panic defense” the one news station reporting on it will put in the eulogy that “they were always civil and ‘one of the good ones’” just after their deadname.

            • Lemdee@lemmy.world
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              Where in the fuck did that come from?? This has nothing to do with violence against trans people, this has nothing to do with dead naming. I know you seem to be angry but stay on topic.

              This is about a cis man who was asked if he would date a trans man, and the comment section that happened after. Nothing else.

              He said he would date a pre-op trans man, because he is not attracted to penis and is attracted to breasts. He recognized that it wouldn’t be an easy relationship due to the dysphoria most trans men feel about those two areas, therefore he likely would not end up dating a trans man. He used not the best wording to express this. The comments were mainly in agreement that it was not particularly transphobic. A few comments in the post were transphobic and were then rightfully flamed by the replies. Now here we are.

              • Yeah I wonder where that came from. It’s not like the “genital preferences” discussion is preamble to the “not disclosing your trans/genital status is tantamount to rape” discussion. NOPE NO SIREE.

                • Lemdee@lemmy.world
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                  it’s not like the “genital preferences” discussion is preamble to the “not disclosing your trans/genital status is tantamount to rape” discussion.

                  Not when they’re directly asked what their sexual preferences are it’s not?? Somebody asked him what his sexual preferences were, how is a cis person supposed to honestly answer that question if any time they do people like you accuse them of being transphobic?

                  I’m not saying that’s not an issue it’s just wildly unrelated to the topic at hand.

                  • Good Girl [she/they]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                    1 year ago

                    He disclosed his sexual preferences - women.

                    Genital preferences aren’t sexual preferences. Genitals are like any other physical attribute. Nobody is saying you can’t have a genital preference, that’d be like saying you can’t prefer one hair color over another. The problem is genital preferences are widely used as a shield and a dog-whistle to discredit and derail discussions about trans people in a sexual context.

                    Gross ass comments about women aside (femininity = solely secondary sexual characteristics apparently), the problem people have with the original comment is that he doesn’t see trans men as men, he literally admits to seeing them as women-lite. That’s the problem.

    • priapus@sh.itjust.works
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      It was clear to me that the boob part was in jest, just a joke about the fact that he is attracted to boobs while someone who is trans would not want them. Op made it clear that they would not want to be with someone who is a trans guy because they would be incompatible. Them saying this does not mean they would abuse a trans partner.

      I do agree though that many of the other comments are transphobic. I’m dissapointed that many of them were upvoted, it’s a shame to see this community think like that.

        • priapus@sh.itjust.works
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          Please actually read my comment, including the edit since I hit send early by accident. I don’t feel that this comment was transphobic, but I do feel that many of the other actions in that thread are.