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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/LostWorked on 2024-06-27 18:01:38+00:00.

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Trigger Warnings: Infidelity, Physical Violence, Sexual Abuse, Incest

Deleted posts recovered via unddit

I am NOT the OOP, that is u/ReNotGotLuv

Original Post - May 14th, 2024

I honestly can’t believe I’m even posting this because sometimes it feels like I’ve walked out of a bad story. But pretty much, I (27m) have two siblings, my sister Cass (30f) and my brother Mark (32m). Our parents divorced when I was 10 and we split time between the both of them. Cass was always closer to our dad and she has always disliked Mark to the point of claiming things about him which are hard to believe. However, as much as she’s disliked him, she’s always loved me.

Five years ago, it turned out that Mark’s wife Jane was cheating on him with our father. It obviously caused chaos, Cass sided with our dad, Mark moved in with our mom and I sided with him. But even though I sided with him, I’ve always kept in contact with Cass. And Mark is fine and all right with that.

I didn’t see my dad again until this Friday when he and Jane dropped Cass off at our mom’s for mother’s day. I was outside walking home and my dad noticed me and I don’t know why, but I agreed to have coffee with them. It was a really tense conversation between us and I confirmed that he wouldn’t be invited to my wedding and I didn’t know if I wanted to get to know his and Jane’s kids and he even told me I did the right thing choosing Mark. It was weird but he dropped me off after about half an hour but Mark saw him do that from the window and since then he’s been cold and snippy with me. Was I the AH for talking to my dad?

Comments:

• OOP on an incident between Cass and Mark: “I did not decide that she’s wrong and that it didn’t happen. I don’t know if it happened. I was twelve years old at the time. Pretty much, Cass had a laundry basket in her closet and his camera was on top of the basket facing outward into her room. It was dead when she found it and she claimed Mark must have been recording him but he claimed that our mom put it there when she did laundry but he never let anybody look into the SD card. Our mom didn’t remember if she did or didn’t.”
• OOP on when the incident occurred: “This was fifteen years ago, there’s been nothing like that from him since then and I can respect that’s what Cass believes and it’s why she keeps him at arm’s distance.”
• OOP on his sistepmother-in-law and his half-siblings: “Jane is 35 and the kids she’s had with my father are three and one.”

Update 2 - May 23rd, 2024

So, I didn’t plan on updating but things really escalated.

My brother Mark had a meltdown where he ranted at mom for not caring more about what our dad did to his life, then at Cass for always halfway associating with him just for mom’s sake and then he kicked me in the stomach and I literally fell through a table like it was WWE or something. Cass wound up saying that his behaviour is why Jane left him and she’s better off off with our dad and called the cops on him. I feel the worst for our mom because she just wanted a good mother’s day and I feel like our issues with each other just ruined her weekend.

I did go to the hospital but only because Cass begged me to. I’m perfectly fine, there’s nothing wrong with me. I didn’t press charges on Mark, I just feel really bad for him. I feel like life’s dealt him a pretty garbage hand and there’s no point in me making things worse. But Mark did leave, he moved out and I don’t know where he is now. He only talked to our mom before he left and she hasn’t told me what it was about.

Mom, Cass and I had a big conversation about things and Cass admitted that she doesn’t love or like Mark and brought up other incidents from when they were teenagers and that she doesn’t trust that he wasn’t trying to spy on her. She admitted that he was right that she only associated with him for mom’s sake and that she’s glad that Jane is with our dad. That felt really rough to hear and it made our mom cry a lot.

As for our dad? Cass made it clear that she’s not going to stop seeing him and Jane and told me that while she wants me to get to know our little siblings, she’s never going to force me to and she’ll understand if I never do.

I felt like I had to post this because I needed to vent. I wish there was some resolution to all this that we could be a family again but, I’m angry and frustrated that there is none and it’s like there never will be.

Comments:

• OOP on Cass and their mom: “My mom divorced my dad when I was just a teenager, she doesn’t care for him and hates him for what he did to Mark. But Cass has made it clear to her that her relationship with him is not something she’ll discuss with her. But beyond that? Cass loves our mom, she loves almost everyone and everything, it’s just Mark that she’s always seemed to hate.”
• OOP on him and Cass: “My sister literally saved my life and my fiancee’s life, you would be lucky to have a sister like her.”
• OOP on the other incidents that Cass brought up between Mark and her: “My sister never said that he raped her, in fact she was adamant that he did not. She told us several things when we had our talk and one of the things was that when she was 14, he had a party at home and she got really drunk and passed out. She woke up in his bed and felt something was wrong and she wasn’t properly dressed but was adamant that he did not rape her but that he did do inappropriate stuff.”

Update 3 - June 18th, 2024

Anyway, to give an update if y’all want it, Mark has pretty much gone off the deep end. Last week, he messaged our mom to clear out his room because he’s not coming back and to just throw it all away. As she was doing this, Cass came to visit and decided to help and they found a USB in his closet. I wasn’t home for this but apparently Cass argued with my mom until she let her open it and there was like a cavalcade of photos of her in there. Nothing inappropriate from what my mom told me but it made Cass have a breakdown and she spent time in the hospital psych ward.

She got out a few days ago and I’ve talked to her but I haven’t seen her because our dad picked her up and she’s stayed with him. But on sunday, she put up a big instagram post praising our dad and Jane and mocking Mark and saying the worst stuff about him. That somehow made its way to him wherever he’s gone and he came crashing home yesterday because of it. He literally drunk drove his Prius into my truck when trying to park in the driveway.

And thankfully I was with my fiancee’s family because according to mom, he demanded to see me so he could kick my ass because now he’s blaming me for all of this. And to be honest, I kind of am too. Everything was mostly fine until I got in that car with my dad and it’s like everyone’s spiralling now. Even me a little bit, if I’m being honest, but now, I mostly just feel bad for our mom because this whole thing has got her feeling so down and awful and inadequate about herself.