Ug. Unrequited love. I think they wrote a few plays about that back in the day. They usually had bad endings.
Humour aside, the best way you can deal with this is tackle it head on. He’s Just a Guy, honestly, and there are many other fish in the sea. Put yourself in his SO’s shoes and ask how you’d feel if the person you were in to was macked on by somebody else. Then imagine him doing all your pet peeves: leaving the toilet seat up if you’re a gal, hogging the covers on the bed, letting the dog or cat out, overfeeding or underfeeding said cat or dog, and 101 other annoyances I almost GUARANTEE you he’ll do at least one of, if not far more.
As for him being able to tell, what you do about it depends on what your and his actual relationship are. For instance, if you’re mere acquaintances, avoiding him is probably the best bet. If you have a professional relationship with him, keep it professional and channel your feelings for him elsewhere, preferably something healthy like meeting new people and expanding your after-work friend group. If you’re friends with the guy, and you have a strong friendship that you don’t want to lose, you’ll have to evaluate that friendship to determine if you should keep things bottled up and do the whole ‘look for dates’ thing, or if you level with him and tell him you have the hots for him but understand those hots will never be acted on, or something else, and see if you and he can work through diffusing this. Humour is my go-to for these kind of solutions. “Hey, I really like you, like more than friends, but I know you are dating so and so. Can you give me your top ten reasons why I shouldn’t date you? Be graphic!”
It’s tough in love out there, and I wish you the best of luck!
Ug. Unrequited love. I think they wrote a few plays about that back in the day. They usually had bad endings.
Humour aside, the best way you can deal with this is tackle it head on. He’s Just a Guy, honestly, and there are many other fish in the sea. Put yourself in his SO’s shoes and ask how you’d feel if the person you were in to was macked on by somebody else. Then imagine him doing all your pet peeves: leaving the toilet seat up if you’re a gal, hogging the covers on the bed, letting the dog or cat out, overfeeding or underfeeding said cat or dog, and 101 other annoyances I almost GUARANTEE you he’ll do at least one of, if not far more.
As for him being able to tell, what you do about it depends on what your and his actual relationship are. For instance, if you’re mere acquaintances, avoiding him is probably the best bet. If you have a professional relationship with him, keep it professional and channel your feelings for him elsewhere, preferably something healthy like meeting new people and expanding your after-work friend group. If you’re friends with the guy, and you have a strong friendship that you don’t want to lose, you’ll have to evaluate that friendship to determine if you should keep things bottled up and do the whole ‘look for dates’ thing, or if you level with him and tell him you have the hots for him but understand those hots will never be acted on, or something else, and see if you and he can work through diffusing this. Humour is my go-to for these kind of solutions. “Hey, I really like you, like more than friends, but I know you are dating so and so. Can you give me your top ten reasons why I shouldn’t date you? Be graphic!”
It’s tough in love out there, and I wish you the best of luck!
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