My cat once brought me a frog. He was an indoor cat and we were on the 2nd floor. I do not know where the frog came from.
Must have been very good at jumping.
Imagine breaking the frog record for jumping and then getting eaten by a fucking cat before getting to pass on your genes.
This is why we cannot have nice things.
My cat is great at catching spiders. There are however a few caveats:
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Spiders must be sufficiently enormous to be fun. Somewhere between “Oh lawd he coming” and Shelob.
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Spider catching only happens at night, and only in the bedroom.
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Cat will make a few chirping noises to alert us that a spider is being hunted.
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All spiders must be delivered as gifts onto the chest or face of one of us.
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Note I only said great at ‘catching’. Delivered spiders are very much alive and very fucking irate about the current state of affairs.
Saved you a click.
That’s what cards are for lol
I slammed my Blue Eyes White Dragon on my phone screen, but it didn’t show me the text of the post?? Do I need a Black Lotus or something?
Swords of revealing light, duh
You didn’t have enough energy (cards)
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Finally a bright side to being such a light sleeper that my cats are not allowed in the bedroom!
One of our cats will violently paw at a door for at least half an hour when needed.
I legit just had to just let mine in the front door after she was flipping the weather strip for a good 15min, back door is wide open mind you and it’s the one she walked out of 30mins prior
Yeah same with my fella. It’s literally the LET ME IN meme
Some years ago when I was working for crap pay all the time, my cat learned to get attention when I’d run in to use the powder room. After that job was over, I could never shut the door to do my business while he was alive, for that reason.
Were you working as a pirate?
I worked retail in a corporation, so I guess that’s fair enough.
I’d also ask why whoever wrote this has giant spiders in their bedroom.
Probably Australian. I believe it’s required by law there.
My cat brings frogs and shelobs too, but from outside.
Sometimes also mouthfuls of ragweed from a pond, so he has a big green beard and he goes and gets more and piles it up next to me.
The pond plants are fine.
The fully alive animals that he then allows to roam free, not so much.
Bonus memory: oh, Biz looks like he’s got a weird whisker twitch… get up close nope it’s half a giant spider fighting for freedom and vengeance. Spat it out on my lap. Extremely high pitch noises ensue.
This must be a uniquely terrifying experience for Aussie cat owners.
I really don’t think I would have a cat anymore if that happened more than once…
Better spiders than mice
I prefer mice, they taste better
Nope nope nope
That genuinely made me laugh, thank you OP!
Original post, and there’s more! 😂
