I’ve had a ‘passion’ for programming for all my life, but recently I’ve been getting into a very, very emotional state over stuff like tooling and small things like that. The smallest things make me go off these days, and I feel so tired after every discussion. Feeling like I am in the wrong or that I don’t know what I’m talking about. I wish I could just make it all go away or somehow be happy or succeed some day. I never will tho
I can’t speak to your mental state, but I can speak to the tech. What helped me was to focus not the detail but the goal. My goal was to release a feature into production that was decently sustainable while growing personal and professionally and having some fun.
I learned to let go of the little things. An example is a code formatting. People freak out about this topic. My standpoint is I don’t care what you pick, but give me an automatic code formatter, be consistent and never talk to me about this boring topic again.
Think of the goal, don’t fixate on the details. Move forward. Save your energy for the right time. If someone makes a decision you don’t like either get behind it, support it and move forward - out quit.
It’s not worth the energy.