• GrymEdm@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    “In the years since, Trump has invariably tweaked the questions he allegedly received on the test, at times boasting that he had correctly recited five words and performed basic multiplication while at other times insisting that he had passed thanks to correctly identifying a whale. That is, in spite of the fact that the test’s authors claim that none of the three versions in circulation actually have a whale on them.”

    Being proud of answering an ever-changing set of non-existent questions is the most Trump thing ever. “Actually. AWKCHEWAALLLYYYY, there definitely was a whale. I remember because I’m fantastic at whales, and this was the whalest I’d ever seen. I was like, ‘Wow, that’s definitely a whale’”. At least he can supposedly do basic multiplication, which makes him way more capable with numbers than some politicians like Marjorie Taylor Greene who has trouble just pronouncing them. Imagine how much more upset he’d be at the huge numbers involved in the payments he has to make if he couldn’t even read them…

  • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Debates were never about the issues, it was about seeing how a candidate could handle themselves when not just reading a speech.

    I doubt we’ll actually have one this election.

  • merde alors@sh.itjust.works
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    4 months ago

    after who knows how many years i still laugh when i hear the words furniture or future.

    They sacrifice every day for the furniture… and future… of their children.

  • nucleative@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Kind of amazing he hasn’t had a heart attack yet. How can his stress level not be 100 out of 100?

    • IphtashuFitz@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      You think his stress level is high now, just wait until the NY Attorney General seizes Trump Tower after he fails to pay that multimillion dollar judgement against him.

  • Daft_ish@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I mean, this is the greatest comedic act that will be talked about for generations. Move on.

    You accuse the man of dementia so he goes and takes a dementia test and passes. Now all he does is talk about how he passed the lowest bar ever set for the leader of the wealthiest country in the world. Conservative humor sucks but this one’s obvious.

    Try talking about, like, that rape he did

  • SnausagesinaBlanket@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    NSFW

    spoiler

    “shit”, “piss”, “fuck”, “cunt”, “cocksucker”, “motherfucker”, and “tits”.

    oh sorry, that was George Carlin…