Marxist-Leninist in Appalachia. I work in “tech,” have a deep passion for linguistics (BS in CSD) and games (video and tabletop), and have recently cultivated an interest in anti-imperialism and Western media criticism. I am currently pursuing an MA in media studies, aiming PhD long-term. DMs open!

  • 4 Posts
Joined 4M ago
Cake day: Apr 18, 2022


My workplace offers it alongside surrogacy and adoption support, and of course I feel compelled to stay long enough to utilize one of the three if it’s necessary despite dogshit treatment. I don’t know why this isn’t at the top of the average American’s list of priorities.

  1. You know exactly who they’re talking about, you even reference it at the end with “vocal minority.” It’s not a minority though, I don’t know how you could jump on board with the concept without being enthusiastic about it. I don’t know a single person involved in crypto that isn’t singing its praises to a fault, online or offline, and “coincidentally” they all dislike when the “bad guys” get involved despite going on about endless use cases.

  2. I’m tired of seeing arguments that it’s just a tool/technology. Folks always claim it’s somehow being used incorrectly because the use case doesn’t match expectations. It’s more an ideology (borderline mysticism with some claims made about it) and always has been, which is why calling people a cryptobro even sprung up. Being defensive about it/staying in denial about that doesn’t improve the situation.

  3. Why does this just feel like a bad faith Reddit response? Like, to the point it got me and is now making me respond? Just scrolling through your comment history is a sea of negativity directed toward others here. I’m not talking civil disagreement and discussion, but constant disbelief and outrage at others in the community. Can we leave that stuff at the door when we come here?

Feeling pretty good, want to share my good vibes with y'all for a moment
I registered for classes today (a research writing course where I've got to submit a paper to a journal by the end of the semester and a class on US foreign policy and its history, trying to convince my advisor I can do a third despite working "full time," I have an absurd amount of downtime in reality), paid the first installment of my tuition for the semester with money I earned from serving tables on the side, hooked up my desktop at my new apartment (even though a week without it did me good), moved some stuff to the proper place and cleaned a bit at the new place, applied to some GA positions (can't beat the tuition reimbursement, most are just dicking off on-call on campus for 10-20 hours/week, better than serving tables), and paid off a bunch of medical bills. I'm just so excited for school to start again, especially because I get access to free bus fare, free therapy, free basic doctor's visits, and a free gym membership. My partner and I walked to get lunch and it felt great outside and to be in the city I love again instead of the suburbs (now just to get a bike...). My paper shredder breaking didn't even touch this good mood shit. To top it off, we are going out of town for a few days next week to our other favorite place to celebrate all our achievements the last month and to get vacation mindset out of the way during the semester (my partner and I are both in school). Hope good things happen for the rest of you and that you feel good too!

That cost is after insurance lmao. It truly sucks here.

If they wanted to find us, they would. There have been times I felt known by at least one agency (not law enforcement though) for inconveniencing and felt targeted, years ago though. Don’t feel like I got as much accomplished either trying to hide from it.

Short of living an extremely difficult and inefficient life and not being able to share our views publicly (antithetical to being a communist outside of obvious inapplicable settings), I don’t think there’s much we could or should do on that front outside of actually meaningful action (e.g., organizing parties). I believe there is this negatively correlated line that comprises of power/impact versus safety. Lemmygrad doesn’t have much of the former unfortunately. Might get targeted for symbolic action at most.

While I agree with you in essence, I don’t put a hammer and sickle on my stuff publicly because I know at the least my shit would get stolen/damaged a lot more. I don’t think I’d get hurt, but it’d make life harder. It’s just my area, the bluest city in a red state. Attempts were made at stalking when I stayed involved in local affairs pseudonymously back in undergrad here. I think wearing one though might be a different story outside of a comment here and there but no threat.

I think it’s actually kind of funny how the circle-A doesn’t remotely deal with any of this because of how exposed we are to it via grafitti and film/TV.

Thank you, I’m probably overreacting…I generally feel they need me more than I need them, but they seem to not like admitting that.

You make a good point about how they don’t care what they do. I sit somewhere in the middle: I have preferences, but I’m concerned about balancing comfort with pay due to other obligations. I am wholeheartedly still playing a different game than them though. Very good chance my standards and honesty are fucking me over for a general fit, but that’s also not a bad thing necessarily.

May is my deadline because they paid an acquisition bonus to “compensate for lost wages due to bonus structure changes.” I took a $17k hit from bonus structure change and they denied me an above inflation raise (I’d gotten similar percentages in the past). With a small bump on contract signing, I got nearly what I asked for but felt I should’ve gotten what I asked plus the bump, but meh. With acquisition bonus on top of those, I ended up at net $8k under OTE expectations.

Truthfully, I’m able to do decent on the present salary despite the cut (I’d done it years prior), but it’s both principle and that I’m paying for grad school out of pocket. I have to bust ass for scholarships, sell belongings (old collectibles mostly), serve tables part time on the side, and I’m ever considering starting up a side gig to ideally replace serving tables. If I just made expected OTE or was paid what everyone else my career level makes, I’d be fine, so it sticks in the back of my head. If I can pull half the salary increase my colleagues who left have gotten, I’ll be more than fine, and since they did I know I can. It’s just being patient and getting there.

Again, thanks for replies. I’m mostly just ranting into the void, so don’t feel pressured to be available.

EDIT: I should mention that student loans are off the table. I’m almost paid up on my undergrad ones, first in family to get a degree and I have no support network so I’m lucky as all hell. Unfortunately, the tumble back down is real if I ever trip or slip, so I want that extra cash on hand available because my partner and I are planning for kids and doctoral programs. I know about deferrals and all that, but I also know her field pays a fuck ton more than mine and I won’t be a burden on her. Thankfully all the PhD programs I’ve been aiming for are fully funded, so paying for school won’t be a problem long term.

I also know about burnout, but I operate on 12/10 most of my life. I’ve never not worked full time while in school in difficult programs. Time, energy, and capacity are thankfully not the things that are issues. My partner’s support network is greater, and having kids in school is strategic to avoid discrimination for her long term in career (“Oh, you haven’t had kids yet? You’ll want them so you’re a liability.”) because if I WFH (and I do) and we have her family available, she has counters prepared for their other nonsense (“Oh, you have kids? You’ll be more available to them so you’re a liability.”). Plus my PhD is less important or can be put on hold because I’m doing it for passion and hopeful eventual dream work.

My “favorite” aspect of Carlin’s legacy is how modern comedians use him to justify their own nonsense, grossly decontextualizing the quote about crossing the line and especially his later commentary on said chuds. Carlin himself wasn’t perfect on the subject, suggesting these folks had a right to be shitty but shouldn’t be, all the while still suggesting they’re not funny. But him saying that alone about them would be wonderful fodder to the contrary of those taking his name in vain and possibly devastating.

I agree wholeheartedly with you and everyone else in the comments. In college, I studied under a philosophy professor who was Marxist, introduced me to Wittgenstein, Virno, a few others. He was investigating humor for a while. Because of him, I started to examine humor more deeply and reject a lot of shit I had felt was harmless in the past.

There is no such thing as “just a joke,” it always serves a purpose. So then, what purpose does a racist joke serve? To spread racism, to promote racism, to befriend a racist, to test out if a new acquaintance is a racist or cool with racism, etc. I don’t know where any of these are prosocial motives.

Commenting on one’s own experience as an oppressed minority is a different field of relation, but doing it for the entertainment of white folks and profiting from it? C’mon, you may have “gotten yours,” but at what cost?

Comedy is dead and comedians killed it.

Way ahead of you, been doing that since they gave me a piddly amount for acquisition and effectively cut my take-home $17k. I’d say that’s why my boss shit on me, but he actually praised me throughout that period until now. My bare minimum also still looks a lot better than most because I aim for my bonus even if it’s a shit amount, it doesn’t take too much more effort.

Thanks for the advice. Unfortunately, the application process varies for me from “just throw us your resume” to “fill out the objective facts of your entire life history.” I haven’t even been getting interviews past nonsense like “record a video answering a few questions for us!” because Iearned back in May that doing homework to help make their jobs easier isn’t worth my effort for a job I’m only getting to help pay the bills as opposed to one I’d love.

My colleagues are recommending just blasting applications in LinkedIn’s Easy Apply and saying it worked for them, and I’m unable to replicate that success. I’m thinking they may be looking at a slightly adjacent position though I’m unwilling to do but as a last resort. It’s a downward movement in my opinion, even if it pays more, and only leads into sales management, which I don’t want to develop into.

Nah, it’s non-poaching. We cannot steal people if we leave. We can’t encourage them to leave with us. It’s vague on general encouragement, which I feel they couldn’t enforce anyway, but if I left Company A for Company B, I cannot help other Company A employees go to Company B.

We didn’t sign any non-competes past “you cannot work for clients for eighteen months after leaving,” which is absolutely enforceable unfortunately.

Thanks a bunch, it’s still a meaningful sentiment!

Advice for post-COVID cough
I got COVID for what I believe was the first time mid-July thanks to some assholes of coworkers in my second job. It lasted with me about a week, but hit me like a train. I've gotten better, my smell and taste are back, but I still have this damn cough. In the past, respiratory infections hit me hard but I only got them every year or two. A cough would linger for a few weeks then go away. This one has me hacking away uncontrollably at times though like a smoker, white to clear mucus, and it's been about three weeks now. Every breath tickles it, some just set it off. Has anyone else had a similar experience and successfully beat it? How so?

Absolutely they are, and they even deserve the success they get and more. I’ve probably applied to 400-500 jobs since April though and had single digits of interviews. Nearly all of them went a month or two, a handful of interviews, then the big success immediately after. This ranged February to May for the ones I know of.

Unfortunately, on paper, we signed an agreement to not poach. They can tell me where they went and that’s really it. That doesn’t mean some sneaky stuff can’t happen, but I also don’t expect any of them to stick their neck out that far and ruin their own gig. None have offered either, but are just as confused as to why I’m falling on my face. I encouraged them and they encourage me now, not for lack of trying.

I know of some things working against me out of my control that aren’t terrible but raise questions (e.g., recent acquisition makes it look like I’m instead job hopping), and some things in my control that aren’t glaring either but could use some polish I just haven’t had time to review in-depth. I know for a fact my resume (double the experience, actual prior hands-on experience in tech) and background (actual STEM degree versus a generic business degree) are still a lot more appealing and broadly applicable on paper than those cats though. Might just have to pull an all-nighter soon and throw the polish on…I don’t know. I’d settle for even 75% what they’re getting. It’s not a contest, I just know I deserve better.

Thank you for the reply.

I have just fucked up so much today lol
I had a few wins with my landlord and getting on a new campaign at work (which ensures job security a little more), despite little sleep. Then my boss ruined my day by telling me I sucked out of nowhere, despite all evidence to the contrary. Unfortunately, everyone who could defend me has left the company recently. He walked back some of the shit he said after I confronted it, but it still made me feel weary about the future. After that, I missed a meeting with a contact who is helping out with my annual review because of the pissiness I felt and technological issues. I didn't get any other errands done and failed to call some folks I was supposed to (like checking up on imaging results from doctor). I kind of just stewed and reached out to people to complain and ask about jobs. I know the solution is to not let it get to me, but it just really caught me off guard because I've traditionally been praised at best, ignored at worst (read: most of the time) at work. I just need a new job, but I've been trying since April with no luck. Colleagues are getting jobs making double me and I don't know how because 95% of the time they're folks who leaned on me for basics. Good for them and all, but...why am I unemployable in comparison? Huge ass meh. I thought I had until next May for a cushion at least, doesn't seem so.

Thank you for the thoughtful response.

I suppose I’ve just been using Discord differently than most. I’ve traditionally been involved in more serious servers and prior social media usage focused on this kind of discussion. I had no issue finding takers and I’ve been wondering why it feels different now.

When there is a lack of seeding for discussion created by others, I do feel a need to rush in and plant those seeds myself. Sometimes I seek opinion from others on something. In a rare occasion, if a space seems to suit it, I may provide updates on something. All of this doesn’t seem compatible with this space, and I might just be blaming the leftists in the space because of prior expectations. Is this fair? Maybe not. I can make judgements all I want, but it doesn’t change the space.

I still want to find an outlet however, and as I said in another comment, that might just be creating a discussion group with a more specific purpose. I hate doing that typically, because I hate splintering where we could just divide within a prior circle, but I’m getting the idea that won’t be possible here.

Thank you for the chance to reflect a little more.

Ah, I wasn’t sure. My mistake. I’m ignorant on any of those locally but I’ve not heard of any.

Are people interested in being educated where you are or how do you approach it?

I’m sorry to hear that. I’m guessing it comes with naivety to the movement or the culture spread on Twitter and Reddit. I’m starting to think I’m not going to get what I’m looking for here and will just have to settle for making a discussion group with a specific purpose and see who bites.

Native as in local to the area? There are none longstanding. Everything is new and tends to have a low shelf life, outside of a few lib organizers but even they go through orgs rather quickly too depending on the issue of the day. I know it sounds like I’m being dramatic, but this state is a whole different beast from what I understand things are like in larger and less rural areas.

I hope things get better for you. I understand and relate. It’s not fun.

I feel kind of lost regarding local leftist circles
It is very likely a case of the area I specifically live in, but I've just about had it after waking up to a message earlier today that I'm letting live rent-free in my head. I admittedly go off on tangents and sometimes write a fuck ton if there is a means to do so (e.g., a Discord server). Most people I interact with on non-political levels, such as childhood friends I've maintained, do one of two things: they read it and respond, or they don't and let it fly. I've made peace with that, to the extent I even made a separate channel on our shared Discord server just for me to rant on shit that's not appropriate to other channels, and everyone is cool with that. I have no problem making friends everywhere I go and maintaining them. But every (and I shit you not **every**) political circle I get involved in locally does not entertain this. It almost seems like it irks them if I try to start up a discussion or get involved in one. Due to the nature of our getting together, it's political. Duh. Political discussions can run long, in time and content. It's actually kind of wild to me how a political circle **verbally** and rudely refuses to read more than a paragraph if they have total freedom to ignore it, or even just refuses to engage any of it at all most of the time past aphorisms or thought-terminating clichés. What is the point of having a group if you aren't going to discuss and build community in the off-hours? I think that is my point, and I've seen all (and I kid you not **all**) of the local groups fail prior because of this inability to build a community at core. It can individually be a fault of platform (not everyone uses one but joined it thinking they might start), time, stress/mental health, introversion, etc., and all of those are understandable, but seeing it happen on repeat seems to me to be more a symptom of something local. I'm the only person keeping some of these groups alive, until I'm not such as when I feel there's nothing left of beneficence to myself. COVID seemingly worsened it, reducing the lifespan on these groups from months to weeks and the frequency of their creation from several a year to one or less annually. Trust me, I've self-reflected on this. I saw therapists nearly my entire childhood due to Tourette syndrome, and so visiting them in adulthood was simple and something I've done often. It helped me come to terms with many quirks about who I am versus how others are, and I found ways to deal with it. What I cannot do is come to terms with how disappointed I am that people will talk about how politically left they are, then just share memes and talk in short sentence fragments about intense subjects when they do talk at all. There's a one-off person here and there that breaks the mold, and they all go on with their life because they're great people...which means moving away lol. Does anyone else have this problem? How do you solve it in person, if at all? I do have plans to leave the area in the next 1-3 years due to a variety of factors not related to this, but I really hate the idea of limiting my in-depth political interactions to online in the meantime. EDIT: Let me elaborate as well that I have sought feedback from loved ones alongside self-reflection and therapy in the past. Folks who could be intimately involved in the situation or at least aware of who I am on an interpersonal level. The conclusion arrived at tends to be of finger-pointing at others. That's well and all, but it doesn't provide me an opportunity to change anything in myself that may be a blocker nor does it help for community building. I view every failure to interact positively as a failure on my own part.