The more I think about it, it seems that long-term happiness is something many people spend their lives seeking OR they believe it’s something they used to have and lost.
That makes me wonder if we are truly ever happy? Or if it’s something that is always just out of reach (in the future or in the past).
The brain is a drug generator
A lot depends on your mindset. In particular nowadays, we are constantly focused on the future. Everything is seen as a stepping stone towards something else. So naturally, happiness becomes a faraway goal: “I’ll be happy when that happens”, but as son as that is reached, a new goal appears. To be happy, you need to live in the present. Accept the limitations of it, and thrive on the rest. Not every situation allows for happiness, but most allow for at least some happiness.
I also think that humans are social animals, so happiness should be found in the connections we have with others, friends, blood family and chosen family.
By nature it is not “possible” it is normal. If your question is whatever is it possible for humans to be happy in a society designed to make you unhappy then the answer is by definition, no.
I think it’s easier without drugs and alcohol enforcing a chemical come down that’s very hard to avoid.
Does lasting mean perpetual and without breaks, or does it mean a default happy state that can of course be interrupted by life events but that will naturally revert to a default state of happiness?
Happiness simply requires you to be thankful for what you have. Not just physical objects but relationships, past times, opportunities, ideas and space to be yourself.
Most of us forget how short life is.
Exactly. I’m not a psychologist or biologist but from what I read, while we are alive, our bodies tend towards homeostasis, a chemically balanced state. Simply, you cannot be in a high-dopamine “happy” state all the time without going back to a neutral or down state afterwards. Even without drugs, highs are usually followed by lows. Not trying to be happy at all times but accepting that sometimes, there are hardships, will help you having a fullfilled and content life.
Anyway, that homeostasis does not mean that everyone is equally happy/unhappy on average. On the one side there are people with depression and on the other side people whose lives have many happy moments. What helps for me is connecting with friends and family, going into nature and seeing animals, doing exercise and having off-screen time, mindfullness and generally having some work-life balance. Which I admit not everyone can afford and I am privileged to have. Doing or having those things helps me having a happier and more fullfilled life, but sometimes life still sucks, there is no happy-all-the-time.
Great comment
Yes. More peace and content than OMG HAPPINESS because life still has its ups and downs but overall I am content. I am not religious but reading topics in taoism and mindfulness have helped.
There’s a very old Denis Leary “joke” about it. I wouldn’t normally take any kind of life advice from him, but this always stuck with me for some reason.
Language warning
“Happiness comes in small doses folks. It’s a cigarette butt, or a chocolate chip cookie or a five second orgasm. You cum, you smoke the butt you eat the cookie you go to sleep wake up and go back to fucking work the next morning, THAT’S IT! End of fucking list!”
Yes. Can’t claim I’ve reached it for myself yet but I know people who are happy and content with their lives.
Life is a tragedy when looked at a whole. All is given and taken away. Appreciate the little moments you get in a day. Attempt not to let the dread of reality weigh on you too much. I don’t remember being anxious or worried before being alive so I have concluded for myself that life after death won’t exactly be worrisome either. Don’t want to die but I sure as hell don’t want to spend my life worried about death as that steals my time from me.
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Not under capitalism. I believe happiness is achievable though, maybe not in the sense of “constant euphoria” though. I think a lot of people misunderstand what it is to be happy… To be healthy, glad to see another day, and fulfilled. To me, that’s happiness.
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Yes, fulfillment, stability, and a healthy social life
I think happiness is a misunderstood concept. It’s something that many people take for granted when they’re young, but as they get older it seems to wane and comes with a lot more caveats. Your baseline used to be happy, but now your baseline is more neutral. You spend 80% of your time being neither happy nor sad. The idea of being happy all the time is sort of a farce, and I tend to assume people who claim to be are either lying or stupid.
Happiness is more about taking a step back from your life and viewing it all in one big picture. If you like what you see, then you can consider yourself happy, even if that doesn’t mean you’re smiling about it right this moment.
I’d look into Stoocism.
Eeeehhhhh Stoicism is more about not being sad than it is about being happy.
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