• Tar_Alcaran@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    At 60k per kilo, my weight in gold is a rough 3.5 million. I’d have a pretty damn horrible day for 3.5 million.

    So that really just rules out stuff with long-term consequences. Asbestos mining, organ donor, etc…

  • kool_newt@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    Law enforcement, I could never respect myself after taking money to be muscle for the psychopathic hoarder class.

    • qyron@sopuli.xyzOP
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      1 year ago

      I have friends in police that joined out of spirit of mission.

      Road safety, counterfeiting detection, contraband, drug traficking, slavery, violent crime, environmental damage, poaching…

      These are situations where police enforce rules for the better of all.

      There is more to being a police than just muscle.

      The police in my country held siege to our parliement building to remember our politicians and government the police is sworn to uphold and defend the country and constitution, not governments and politicians.

      • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 year ago

        If your friend is in America:

        Counterfeiting is investigated by the FBI, drug trafficking prevention (targeted at the source, such as cartels) is handled by the DEA, human trafficking—FBI, poaching is monitored by fish and game.

        There are times when a cop may have the ability to do some good now and again, but a key part of the job is harassing homeless people, busting young black guys for having some coke in their pockets, and sitting on the side of the road getting paid to aim a speed gun for a few hours. Whatever notion your friend had of being a hero is more likely to be found in almost any other law enforcement agency than the bottom level flatfoots we call the police.

        • qyron@sopuli.xyzOP
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          1 year ago

          If your friend is in America:

          And by this sentence alone, I understand you didn’t paid attention to what I wrote.

          I understand americans make up the bulk of Lemmy users but - for crying out loud! - there is more on this freaking space time faring rock than that trench coat nation.

          Do try to broaden your horizons. Read a little. Watch non american media and shows. Get your head out of your ass, while you are at it!

          America is not the world.

          • Swallowtail@beehaw.org
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            1 year ago

            Even as an American this irritates me! There are so many more ways of doing things and living than what we have here. I was fortunate enough to live in a different country for a few years and I’d really recommend it to anyone (especially young people that haven’t put down roots as much yet) in order to gain some perspective and broaden your horizons.

      • hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 year ago

        Ah yes joining the fascist organization to make the world better place.

        I can’t find it but there was a nice Finnish comic where a guy joins nazi army in early 1900s and says “I’m changing the system from inside”

        Edit: found it

      • kool_newt@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        The fact of the matter is that police sign up (i.e. volunteer to do this for pay) to allow themselves to be ordered to do anything including using lethal force against other people they do not know, to ensure the authoritarians in charge get their way.

        The fact that a few nice individuals are deluded, were mislead, got stuck, or have hope they can somehow change the situation, this fact remains true.

        I knew a cop too, I was friends with his daughter for many years. He seemed a nice guy from what I saw. She told me about how he abused her growing up and yet she still thought he was the greatest man to ever live and dated guys just like him.

        • qyron@sopuli.xyzOP
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          1 year ago

          Let me give you some context.

          My country threw a dictatorship less than 50 years. I was born and raised during the early years of the new democracy.

          Back then, basic requirements for joining the police was being able to read and write; coming from the military, especially from the army, was a guaranteed entry.

          People were afraid and instilled fear of the police into their children. Really bad times.

          Fast forward to the 2000’s and a new generation of police is entering service. Being a former military is not a guaranteed entry and can even prove to be a detracting factor. New candidates have to pass aptitude tests, evaluations, screenings. Need to have the mandatory schooling years (by then already 12 years, equivalent to american high school). And undergo a grueling physical and theoretical training: one year.

          When the new generation hits the streets, the kind of “cop” you describe was washed out, by their own comrades, because being a police meant being a trustworthy figure, someone any person can approach for help and aid, especially children.

          Are there any bad apples? Obviously. In the same way you can have bad agents in any profession. Even the best cloth get stains. But you can trust a police officer in my country.

          A police is mandated by law to salute a civilian when aproaching one and is obligated to present identification if requested for and even take the breathalizer test if you demand it.

          A police officer also has the freedom and obligation to go against orders they understand as against the law, good social standing and moral and can take action against superior in court of law, where hierarchy means nothing.

          A very superficial analysis of what being a police agent in the US tells me you have a militarized police, unfit and untrained to deal with people, and ignorant of law, except that what can be delivered by the pulling of a trigger and brutality.

          That was our police, 50 years ago.

          Your average cop here would get beat up by their comrades and thrown in jail, assuming they would made it through the evaluation.

          Again, the US is not the world, not a good example on any front and even less when it comes to civil rights and police work.

          • kool_newt@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago
            1. There is much that you are probably unaware of – prior to 2020, many if not most people in the U.S. including myself were unaware of just how problematic the police were. I’m not poor or black and had no direct experience, I thought there were a few bad apples in Compton, CA and NYC etc but assumed most cops were decent and just trying to keep the peace.

            2. If you are correct and your police are not currently fucked up, I think your situation is temporary at best. Many things go through a similar cycle, they start out apparently working great or at least good enough and either the problems become more visible as you become more aware, or they get corrupted over time. Think about how many small companies (ahem, Google) start out with noble intentions and full of good people, but because of the profit motive seek power, and become corrupt. Think about taking a new job with energy and optimism and realizing over months it’s not what you thought because of entrenched power.

            Make no mistake, if it’s not already this way, the laws will be changed in favor of the police as their unions get more powerful and their ability to get friends into high place improves. As the number of bad apples comes to outnumber the good ones, any real freedom or obligation to go against orders or do the right thing and blow a whistle disappears. As the number of atrocities that must be covered up grows, the mechanisms become darker and darker (just like in the Catholic Church) and the people involved more and more sick in the head.

            Any time you have a concentration of power you will attract those that want power. It may take a couple decades but the “good cops” you have now will be replaced and then you will have little recourse to correct the problem because you will have a heavily armed, well funded gang full of sadists with a license to kill and powerful unions to protect them.


            Authority is like a pile of steaming shit and psychopaths and sadists are like flies. This effectively leaves each society with a choice to make:

            1. Make piles of shit (positions of power) and just deal with the flies and the consequences (i.e. eventual fascism or something like it)

            2. Make piles of shit and attempt to keep the flies away (this has never in history worked for more than a generation or so)

            3. Don’t make piles of shit (arguably how humanity lived for 200,000 year prior to the emergence of state power) and live a life with few flies, nothing you can’t swat away. This is called anarchism.

            • qyron@sopuli.xyzOP
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              1 year ago

              Police have unions for negotiating better conditions but they don’t displace power to the polices: police does not have right of strike. At best, what police officers can do is a strike of zeal, where they overlook most situations except for the most grievous.

              This implies a speeding ticket will not get written but a bank robbery will be dealt with.

              Again, the US is no example for anything, and even less for this.

              Police is not a for-profit organization; it’s a pillar of the democratic state and as such is moved by a mission not an production objective, which some ingenious politians and high ranking officers have tried to do, with horrible results, like police agents openly denouncing it to the public.

              The checks and balances you fear will be knocked down are so scattered, it would take the complete dismantling of our entire country to remove it. Just recently, it was eliminated a specialized police tasked with immigration and border control and the back lash has been immense: people want specialized agents for specialized functions, regardless the previously dismantled force being disbanded for serious and proven cases of abuse of power and corruption, which led to arrests.

              To prevent one force to feel unchecked we have three different polices, a plethora of specialized agencies and a central investigation department directly under the orders of the republic prosecutor. Too many people checking on too many people. This model works so well, even politians have been connected to serious corruption schemes lately.

              We solved our war on drugs by removing the crime frame from consumption and carry for personal use, thus releasing police resources to contend with real traficking, not petty matters.

              Take notes. Might be useful to someone.

              • kool_newt@lemm.ee
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                1 year ago

                people want specialized agents for specialized functions

                All of us have grown up in authoritarian systems, trained to look to the state for answers and safety. It’s not surprising that people trained to look to police for safety and penalized for protecting themselves “want” police of some sort.

                Take notes. Might be useful to someone.

                I never said might isn’t useful, it’s incredibly useful to those looking to coerce others. I’m saying it’s the desire to coerce others that is the problem, and law enforcement is the muscle behind the coercion. What reasons are there to coerce another that are not fucked up?

                • qyron@sopuli.xyzOP
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                  1 year ago

                  There is an ugly backdrop of “bad”, “coercion”, “oppression” and “authoritarian” to this conversation.

                  And while I try to concede, to my hability, your good points and ilustrate steps have been taken to remove or diminish points of concern, in an effort to advance for something better, there seems to be an ever deeper entrenching on your part to build up the same points.

                  The state, which authority emanates from the people, does have the monopoly of force, which is a tool to ensure peace and stability inside a society looking to get rid of the need of it.

                  Your stance, to my understanding, veers towards an ideal anarchism, a philosophy I support myself.

                  But like any other social system, anarchy is affected by bad actors, motivated by selfish motives like indifference for their similar, greed or the simple appeal of basic violence against their fellow.

                  How are we supposed to deal with these? Are we all to become vigilantes? Allow angry mobs to apply “justice”? Or should we create special groups, prepared to deal daily with this kind of situation, to make our best collective effort to ensure “force” does not become “violence”?

                  You are the state. You, your neighbour, your community, your district, etc. You live in a crooked system you have allowed to flourish. Do you expect change to happen by spontaneous generation? Your default stance is of distrust. The “man” is out to get you. Guess what? You are the “man”. You trapped yourself by your own actions.

                  Your reality is not universal. That is what I’ve been trying to pass across. Regardless a perfect system not existing, better than what you experience is possible and exists.

      • MiddledAgedGuy@beehaw.org
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        1 year ago

        It’s hyperbole, sure. But it’s not inaccurate. Any given police offer, and I want to believe a large majority mean well. But on the whole there’s truth to it.

        Edit: A few, but notably more positive phrasing towards individual officers.

  • charlytune@mander.xyz
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    1 year ago

    Military / weapons, police, bailiffs, pyramid scheme grifts, wellness grifts, petrochemicals, mining, financial services (unless it was something like a credit union)

    • TheMurphy@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      You wouldn’t work for the police for 3-5 million???

      How awful must the police be where you live?

      • charlytune@mander.xyz
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        1 year ago

        No I wouldn’t. It would go against my ethics and my politics. Police are police, everywhere. Ultimately they exist to protect the interests of the ruling classes. While the level of violence and corruption and abuse of power might vary from place to place, and there may be good work that they do, there is violence and corruption and abuse of power wherever there are police. I want no part in that, no money is worth it. And I wouldn’t last long in a racist and sexist workplace anyway.

        • TheMurphy@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          You could be the change you want to see and earning alot of money, to maybe do more change you care about.

          It’s literally worse for everyone, that you say no to this. Including yourself.

          • charlytune@mander.xyz
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            1 year ago

            I mean I’m very flattered that you think that me joining the police would revolutionise it but… No. That’s not how change happens. Otherwise it would have already happened. I’m sorry my decision to turn down a fictional offer of joining the police offends / upsets you.

            • TheMurphy@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              Dw, not upset. It’s fictional, and so is the arguments we are making for this. It just doesn’t make sense in this fiction setting, that’s all.

        • _TheThunderWolf_@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          if you earn lots of money then given that police is state funded thats ~5mln away from the state which is good or bad depending on many things

      • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 year ago

        Out of all the things on the list, that was the one I understood the most. I’d be willing to risk my body, comfort, or sanity for a few million, but joining the police will cost you your soul.

          • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            1 year ago

            To be honest, I sort of forgot it was only for a day, lol.

            On second thought, I might do it, but I would be the worst cop possible and enforce no laws since I could just offer the boss $100,000 or so to not fire me until tomorrow.

            AC do be B though.

  • Ataraxia@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    Selling things to people who shouldn’t have it or need it. Money doesn’t mean shit if you’re fucking people over.

  • AlligatorBlizzard@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    Executioner for the US prison system. In some states it’s a real job, and it’s not a doctor, it’s just whoever is sociopathic enough to want to do it.

  • KISSmyOS@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Only those that could mess up my health or psyche permanently in one work day, or harm others:

    front-line soldier in an active war zone
    screening online images flagged as CSAM
    contract killer

    I can’t think of much else that I couldn’t grit my teeth, do the bare minimum for 8 hours and walk away set for life.

    • liv@lemmy.nz
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      1 year ago

      I did that. It was amazing how many people tried to make it into some kind of sex call.

  • BilboBargains@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Sex worker would be pretty rough and possibly deadly. Being a soldier in one of America’s resource wars. Anything to do with criminal justice. Working in a narcotics cartel. It’s a lot of gold but no point if I’m gonna die.

    • Poik@pawb.social
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      Sex worker could be fairly safe, if sex workers had any rights in my country. (context: USA. There are countries where sex workers are are least somewhat respected and have rights. Not here.) Then it would be about as safe as being a doctor who makes house calls, or hospice, or other jobs where you may be in private with another person for some reason.

      • BilboBargains@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Agree, sex work is generally far safer in jurisdictions where it has been legalised and regulated e.g. Netherlands, Germany. It still carries the weight of Judeo-Christian guilt which leads to some unhealthy outcomes, usually for women.

  • andrew@lemmy.stuart.fun
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    1 year ago

    I’m a big guy so my weight in gold is pretty compelling tbh.

    I’d probably do anything not deadly or grievously injuring for $7.5M in gold in one day.

    • marco@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      I just checked, I’m thinking about almost 9m USD for this here dad bod 😂

    • qyron@sopuli.xyzOP
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      1 year ago

      Come on, give us something precise.

      Crossing the street is potentially deadly or grievously injuring and yet we do it every day. And for free!

      • andrew@lemmy.stuart.fun
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        I guess I mean anything nearly guaranteed to risk grievous injury like getting hit by a bus or something. If I can still use the 7.5mil after the day’s over I’ll do it all.

  • laxu@sopuli.xyz
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    I think you could do almost anything for a day. One day is “Here’s Jim, he’s new, and we are going to show him how we do things here” stuff where little actual work happens.

    A month would be a more realistic situation. I wouldn’t want to be military in an active war zone, work for a drug/trafficking cartel, or any other dangerous profession where the likelihood of dying or going to prison is high. Or professions where I’d have to actively harm people.

  • teawrecks@sopuli.xyz
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    1 year ago

    I don’t think any reasonable person would actually turn down their weight in gold for one unpleasant day of work, unless there was a high probability of grievous injury or death to themselves or others.

    But if we’re just being hyperbolic, I deliberately never worked in the food industry. I knew if I worked in food somewhere, I would get sick if it and never want to eat there again.

        • Num10ck@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          i hear you. i also know a couple of friends who made a silly amount of money doing evil things and now they are drinking themselves to death joylessly. you have to live with yourself and you’ll always know its blood money.

  • Damaskox@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    First thing that comes to my mind is something military-like or something that involves killing People (innocent or not).

  • d3lta19@lemmy.ca
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    Joke answer: retail

    Serious answer: anything that took me more than 50 ft above the ground

    • LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world
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      i pay money to jump out of airplanes for fun and am astounded at how many people are expressing acrophobia in these comments, so much acrophobia that you wouldn’t even leave the ground for a few million dollars

  • Buck Fucket@lemmy.world
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    Working in a foundry or an oil rig. They both seem like pretty shit jobs due to the hazards, materials and conditions.

    • Unforeseen@sh.itjust.works
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      Know a manager of an oil rig.

      Away from friends and family for months at a time, extremely dangerous, 12+ hour shifts, constantly dealing with issues with staff and all around miserable and stressful. Said he wished he had gotten into literally anything else.