• enkers@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    Somebody actually took time to sit down and draw this.

    I guess my life isn’t that bad after all.

  • AFK BRB Chocolate@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    It’s much easier to argue against something if you completely make up ridiculous scenarios to argue against.

    Our kid is non-binary. No parent is happy for that to happen. I don’t think any person is happy to realize it about themselves, except to the extent that it explains why they had been so unhappy previously.

    • Kecessa@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      That’s the thing the angries don’t realize, life would be much simpler for the people concerned if they were just cis-heteros, it’s not about being contrarians and it’s not a choice, it’s just who they are and that should be ok so it becomes something that isn’t more difficult!

      • AFK BRB Chocolate@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Exactly! I’ve never experienced it first hand, but I’ve seen the anguish of friends whose parents keep setting them up on straight dates with people they fundamentally aren’t attracted to. I’ve had trans women friends who weren’t close to passing and who desperately wanted a relationship with a straight man. Often they’d end up dating gay men, feeling unsatisfied because those men treated them like another man. So much sadness.

        I often think that the people who believe sexuality is a choice must at least be bi. There’s just no circumstance where I could choose to be attracted to men instead of women, and it’s laughable to think otherwise. I feel like anyone who thinks otherwise must have the capacity to make that choice, and the poor reasoning skills to think someone would.

        • A Phlaming Phoenix@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          As a bi guy, it doesn’t work any different for us. We’re attracted to men and women whether we like it or not. We don’t choose our attractions. We don’t think it’s a choice.

          • JokeDeity@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago

            What sexuality am I if I love everything about women and feminine looks, but also like a big fat cock, yet dislike literally every single other thing about men and masculinity? Legitimately asking.

            • A Phlaming Phoenix@lemm.ee
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              1 year ago

              I don’t know, and it’s not for me to say. Sexuality is a fluid spectrum, and I’m reluctant about labels in the first place. I’m especially reluctant to label an Internet stranger for them. You are what you say you are. Sounds like somewhere in the bi/pan/omni range.

                • JackGreenEarth@lemm.ee
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                  1 year ago

                  I know. Also top surgery. I don’t think surgery should be forced on anyone who doesn’t want it. If they do want it it’s a different matter of course

                • Schmoo@slrpnk.net
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                  1 year ago

                  You’re not alone, I’m the same way, albeit a bit more open to somewhat masculine traits (my attraction extends to twinks or sufficiently effeminate men). This made it hard to understand if I was bi or something else, but eventually I concluded that the words we choose to use are inherently imprecise because we create them to represent definite categories that only approximate reality.

                  My attraction to all women, some men, and trans women w/o bottom surgery I guess makes me approximately bi.

            • DroneRights [it/its]@lemm.ee
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              1 year ago

              You’re either a lesbian, a straight man, or a femme-attracted nonbinary. Penis doesn’t make someone a man or not a woman, and it sounds like you’d be very happy with a penis having female woman.

          • Kecessa@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            Yeah I think some people don’t understand that it’s no better if you need to contain your feelings for someone just so you can try and find someone else to be with just so you can pass for an hereto…

          • AFK BRB Chocolate@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Oh, understood. My thought was that those far right Christian conservatives who think people choose to be gay must live straight lives but have at least some attraction to the same sex.

    • TheFresh16@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      As someone in their late twenties who just recently came to understand and accept that I am nonbinary, I applaud you for your acceptance of your kid.

      I never fit in growing up and never knew why. Now as an adult I still probably won’t mention it to my parents, despite making some significant life changes, due to their proven lack of empathy.

      • AFK BRB Chocolate@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        That sucks, I’m sorry. If there’s anyone in your life who should accept you for who you are, it’s your parents. They’re the ones who have seen the most of your life experiences, and who contributed whatever stuff you were born with.

        I certainly wish our child had an easier situation, but they’re beautiful and brilliant and kind, and we couldn’t be prouder of who they’ve become.

        • TheFresh16@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          No need to apologize but I appreciate the empathy! We definitely need more parents like you in the world. Though your parenting may be more challenging than some have it, just know the tremendous impact you are making by being accepting of them!

          The crazy thing is that I am actually a parent myself. It is very challenging to work towards being who I want to be, my true self, compared to what I grew up thinking a parent should look like. It is especially hard to become myself outwardly, in this stage of life, without feeling like I am putting my needs above my family’s. For this reason I again appreciate your views on your kid - I very much wish I knew myself earlier on.

          Nonetheless, through the help of therapy, my current focus is to be, love, and accept my authentic self such that my little ones can see an example of acceptance in whomever they want to be. The nonbinary parent role models are few and far between so I must try to be my own!

          • AFK BRB Chocolate@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Inspiring comment. You know, for eons (and still, somewhat today) people in horrible marriages would stay together “for the children.” Maybe a laudable sacrifice, but it turns out that it screws up the kids worse than divorcing and getting into healthy relationships, because kids learn about relationships from watching their parents.

            I feel like that’s analogous to a non-binary or trans parent keeping their true self hidden to protect the children. I don’t think it’s been studied, but I think it’s very likely that a similar thing would happen and the kids would be better off being with parents who love themselves for who they are.

            So good job, I think you’re doing the right thing.

            • TheFresh16@lemm.ee
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              1 year ago

              Very interesting analogy that is certainly of the same mindset. It may feel “best” or “most appropriate” to avoid a disruptive or countercultural change, but it won’t ultimately be for the benefit of anyone. All that it would create is a slow burn of regret and animosity for oneself and those whom you were trying to put first. Life is hard, might as well make it worthwhile! Thanks for the validation and likewise to yourself, I wish you all the best.

  • rosymind@leminal.space
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    1 year ago

    I haven’t yet seen anyone else point out:

    If the embryo was tested, they would know the sex before transferring it to the surrogate uterus (easily avoiding the problem). IVF is insanely expensive, as are surrogates. (Surrogates go for $50k plus per pregnancy)

    Whoever did this comic is so willfully (and woefully) ignorant on so many levels that I wonder how they’re able to function at all

      • rosymind@leminal.space
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        1 year ago

        Yeah, and the cost is dependant upon location. Surrogates tend to be women who have easy (or easier) pregnancies, who want to help other people in need.

        I’m not saying that desperation or exploitation don’t happen, just that generally surrogates are people who are doing it out of love for other people (not for the money)

    • totallynotarobot@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Not disagreeing with your comment, but $50k??? That’s IT??

      What a fucking insult. That is some straight up exploitative shit.

      • Fraylor@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        That’s just the cash payment. All of the medical stuff is paid for, usually further amenities so the surrogate maintains low stress and such for the health of the baby.

        • DroneRights [it/its]@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          Giving birth can stop you from working for a few months. Given this, if you’re working as a surrogate you may have to give up important career opportunities. 50k is a pretty low price on that missed work.

          • Fraylor@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago

            You’re not wrong, but I was extrapolating based on the other individuals perception.

      • rosymind@leminal.space
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        1 year ago

        If it makes you feel better, it’s usually more. There are a lot of factors, including how much the surogacy agency gets for their cut, which state or country, if they are a family member or friend, whether the parents are able to add a surrogate on their insurance, etc.

        We looked into it because I’m older and thus higher risk, but ultimately decided against it. My neice even offered to carry our kid, but I just feel too guilty. I’m kind of whatever on having children but my husband has dreamed of being a dad since he was a lil’ boy

        • Oascany@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Not sure about IVF, but in some countries with a high rate of female foeticide, pre-birth sex determination is illegal; although it is still practiced.

        • curiousaur@reddthat.com
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          1 year ago

          Why don’t you just Google it you dunce.

          Here’s the list of countries JUST IN EUROPE where it’s illegal: Denmark, France, Germany, Hungary, Lithuania, Norway, Slovenia, Sweden, Netherlands, and the UK.

            • curiousaur@reddthat.com
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              1 year ago

              Answer the question. While being ignorant, in a thread that started by accusing people of being ignorant, would you ask others to back something up when the information is readily available?

              • Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world
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                1 year ago

                This is a platform meant for discussion and I offered scepticism and further discussion. You’re being a dick.

                • curiousaur@reddthat.com
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                  1 year ago

                  Because I called you a dunce for being ignorant in a thread accusing other of ignorance? Yeah. You’re objectively a dunce kiddo.

              • chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                1 year ago

                You realize that 1. Burden of proof is on the one making the claim, and 2. If someone asks the question it doesn’t mean they were the one to downvote you?

                You really shouldn’t let them get to you so much. People ask questions.

  • Mammal@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Wait, does the author think this is a thing? Or is this lampooning the attitude?

    Classic Poe’s Law.

    • Jiggle_Physics@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      From looking at the person’s social media it would seem they are not making that joke. They are mostly a retweeter of StoneToss and Mr. Pumpkin, both white supremacist comic writers. They seem to occasionally make their own blending the two styles, hence the MrPump_Toss watermark.

  • Mechaguana@programming.dev
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    1 year ago

    They reach so hard for imaginary scenarios, it’s actually amazing how far they will go to justify carrying on their asshole behavior

  • 9thSun
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    1 year ago

    I refuse to believe someone made this unsatirically. (Is that a word? What word am I looking for?)

  • Annoyed_🦀 @monyet.cc
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    1 year ago

    Ahh yes, orphanage buy baby so they can let gay parent to adopt, and transgender is forced by parent.

    Checkmate, aesthetic.

    • Cyrus Draegur@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      the illustration is stupid, but what it’s illustrating is not an orphanage but a surrogate.
      it portrays them paying for a surrogate mother to gestate some eggs that were fertilized with either of their sperm,
      and they state that they aborted every fetus that had two x chromosomes until they had one that was XY,
      which they allowed to mature into a viable infant, which was then birthed.

      notice how the infant is reaching for the individual in the bed.
      they are reaching for their mother.

  • gapbetweenus@feddit.de
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    1 year ago

    I would love to talk to someone who really thinks this is funny - we would be like to aliens from different worlds.

    • First@programming.dev
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      1 year ago

      I made the sacrifice and checked the IG account - it’s full of equally bigoted posts, in the spirit of a 4chan incel, where each post has between 0 to 3 likes. Especially the ones where he complains about the dating market are sad.

      It’s a mass shooter in the making.

    • DroneRights [it/its]@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      I think this is funny in the sense that whoever made it is pathetic and I want to laugh at them for being so wrong and hateful

        • Michal@programming.dev
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          It amalgomates a few things the conservatives hate, abortion, gay parents, transgender. The result is grotesque and funny. It’s also funny to think that this is what conservatives think the left wants.

          Maybe it’s because I live in a progressive country i can find the comic amusing. We don’t really get staunch conservatives around here and they are not really a threat.

  • Zozano@aussie.zone
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    1 year ago

    The most realistic part about all of this is walking out of a hospital with a baby one hour after giving birth.

  • Sex-selective abortion is not uncommon, but is an uncomfortable ethical quandry.

    Do conservatives really object to the use of surrogates, or only when they’re used by gay couples?

    TBH, I initially thought the comic was going to be about sex-selective abortion; I didn’t get what they were trying to say until the last panel :-/

    • Elivey@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Using PGD they can choose a baby’s sex but it’s really expensive. Though if someone is shelling out for a surrogate already is gonna be loaded.

      What’s funny is it’s typically used by people who have very binary and old fashioned views on gender, aka conservatives. The people who think like this comic. They want both so dad can teach the boy how to play football and a girl for mom to dress up her little princess!

      I watched interviews of people who had done this and that’s literally how they described it. I don’t think there’s refunds if their kid turns out trans lol

    • Draedron@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      Objecting to surrogates would be one thing conservatives do I understand. It’s basically human trafficking