I just run

cat /dev/urandom | strings | head -10

Until I find something that slaps.

In general I look for receipts or random pieces of paper I find on the side of the curb on a rainy day. But that’s just me.

Get one of the books with baby name suggestions. Weed out all of the names of annoying uncles and aunts, childhood bullies etc. Let your partner do the same. Then get rid of all of the names that rhyme with something silly so they won’t be bullied in school for their name. Then argue about the few remaining names and pick one or a few. Sleep a few nights, then take a long, hot/steamy shower and commit to it.

(You can doodle around in the book, circle a few names and add a few or your favorite movie characters.)

Don’t have kids, but one important tip to keep in mind for the name is, does the name work on an international basis? So many names in my country does not work at all for when they travel abroad.

For example, a very common name here is Simen. Although an alright name, as soon as pronounced in English it does not sound great…

For our kids, we wrote down a small set of rules :

• french origin (with my very french and common surname, living a in french-speaking country)
• kind of rare (I have a very common firstname)
• that would go well or be used in english as well
• that would survive the atrocities of the local heavy accent (teachers and so on…)
• not too long, easy to write
• aesthetically pleasing when written down

We had a couple important criteria for the names we chose. First, it should be pretty easy to yell in case you need to call them, and second is that it’s hard to turn into an insult.

We added the second after a friend named their boy Hurley. Poor guy.

We were careful to choose first names that are easy to spell on first hearing and can be understood in multiple cultures. Their second names are a little bit more exotic in case they don’t like the simpler ones.

It’s a tradition in my family, that all children have the same 1st letter.

For first names we separately compiled lists of names that we liked from whatever sources we could find (Internet lists, books, media l names used in media, etc). We went through each other’s lists and vetoed names that were a hard no. Then we wrote the names out on a sheet of paper in random order in a playoff bracket style arrangement. Each pair had a winner until there was only one.

For middle names, it had to be something that flowed well with the first name. It also had to be able to convey that special sense of “you done fucked up” and disappointment when said with the first name (while emphasizing the second), like “John PAUL”. Finally, candidates were from (mostly deceased) family members.

Names and initials were checked to minimize bullying potential; if we could think of a way to abuse it the name or combination was rejected. For example, Karen would be a no due to current slang usage. Or if the initials would spell ASS.

My wife and I have first names that start with consecutive letters of the alphabet, so I wanted a name that would continue that.

I’ll be honest, the name we chose (that starts with that letter) came from my high school crush. But my wife was aware from the beginning and I was so introverted back then, especially with girls, that it was never remotely serious. The only takeaway from that was that her name was kinda cute (but ages well too - plus her legal name has a lot of flexibility for nicknames)

Last name is single syllable so the first had to be 2 or more. Made a big list of names I liked the sound of and people I admire and let my wife decide from that. Would have been happy with any of them. We didn’t know the sex yet so we picked both a male and female name.

The middle name is Tiberius after James Tiberius Kirk from Star Trek.

Spent ages making lists and whittling it down.

Then yeeted the list 30mins after the birth and picked a name we never discussed, mentioned, no family history, or knew anyone with.

Had to keep suggesting them until we landed on a shortlist of names she hasn’t yelled out in frustration. She was a teacher.

War of attrition.

when we went to the shelter we considered the names on their adoption forms but we also considered colours, markings, and behaviours

oh and they’re cats