Some Republicans are starting to seriously regret Donald Trump’s vice presidential nominee, Ohio Senator J.D. Vance.
It’s been only one week since Vance was nominated at the Republican National Convention, and already his own party members are expressing severe doubts about Trump’s pick. The former president’s allies have acknowledged that nominating Vance was the product of Trump’s absolute certainty that he would be able to defeat Joe Biden in November. While Vance wouldn’t do much for swing voters or independents, he would likely shore up support among Trump’s base.
But ever since Biden passed the torch to Vice President Kamala Harris, the Democratic Party’s new presumptive nominee, Republicans have begun to sour on Vance.
“The road got a lot harder. He was the only pick that wasn’t the safe pick. And I think everyone has now realized that,” one House Republican told Axios Thursday, under the condition of anonymity.
Another House Republican told Axios that Vance “doesn’t add much.”
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The sectional predator himself
“I did not have sectional relations with that sofa”
“Sectional” fuckin hell dude 🤣
God damn, couch - that’s some hoe shit!
Holy fuck, thank you for that laugh
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Again, there is ZERO evidence that JD Vance has reached earth-shattering orgasm in the loving embrace of a two-piece sectional, or that he has had a wild fling or two with wicker outdoor patio furniture. NONE. He certainly has not done so while making disgusting claims about gay people.
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This is probably how furries became popular. People saw that Monty Python skit about the mice men and thought it was funny and started dressing up.
Does JD fuck couches? A lot of people are saying it. The best people. They keep saying it so there must be some truth to it. Just the other day I asked him so you prefer leather, right? It’s so smooth. It’s durable. It’s perfect! He looked me dead in the eye and said, “polyester”. It’s so rough though! That’s why he needs the glove!
i adore that he will live out the rest of his days being known as j.d. the couch fucking mascara muffin man vance
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It’s not about mocking someone who wears eyeliner, it’s about mocking someone who wears eyeliner and pretends they don’t.
your cause is noble, but the outrage over mascara man vance bashing is misguided. “punching down” is insulting race, sexuality, gender, disability, and any other thing that no one chooses for themselves*. makeup is 100% a choice, for everyone. in vance’s example it’s a ridiculous choice, given the requisite strictly defined GOP persona of the “manly man,” which obviously doesn’t involve men wearing makeup. so vance will be mocked for it.
where’s the outrage over making fun of trump’s orange spray tan? guliani’s hair dye leaking forehead?
and if you’re going to bring “gendered insult” into the conversation, then exactly who is arguing under the flawed premise that mascara is just for women, if not the person calling the insult gendered?
don’t worry, i make fun of many, many choices people make, from cartoonishly huge pickup trucks, to cargo shorts
*edit: apparently “punching down” is generally defined to mean attacking people ‘less powerful’ than yourself. i’m still including unchosen circumstances in my usage
I feel like there’s only a handful of people in the world who can “punch down” at a US senator currently running for vice president. I don’t think any of them are hanging out in Lemmy.
You’re a monster. How could you make fun of cargo shorts?
LOL it’s not just me. how many women do you know who don’t think cargo shorts make us look like clowns?
My mom says they make me look handsome and agrees that it’s neat that I can carry all the sticks and rocks we find at the park!
you do you champ!
That’s just anger and jealousy because the fashion industry takes all the pockets from women’s clothes so that there will be enough for men’s cargo shorts. I mean, I get that, and it doesn’t seem fair, but I’m not giving up all the pockets.
which is completely justified. women get attacked for not looking perfect 100% of the time, not wearing makeup, not shaving their entire body, AND can’t find any clothes that have a single functional pocket. and god forbid a gray hair shows up
meanwhile, i’m applauded for not giving a rat’s ass what i look like, shaving zero square inches of any part of my body, and i have the option of clothes with ridiculous numbers of pockets. which IS an option because we don’t have to worry about being attacked for not caring what anyone thinks
All true, but the answer isn’t getting rid of cargo shorts
They stop laughing when I pull an entire Chinese dinner for five out of those cargo shorts. Y’all sneak in your candy to the movies. I’ll do it my way.
The liberal urge to make sure a racist misogynist narcissistic fascist is comfortable in their spaces
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meh fuck that shit
What we should do is praise them for normalizing makeup for men.
I’m sorry but Couch-fucker McGuy-Liner is way too good not to use.
LOL stealing that, fyi
👀
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I fully disagree. He’s only getting mocked for that because he’s a “manly man” who would surely criticize others for similar things. And punish anyone who isn’t cis. No one (surely some exceptions but a very small percentage) mocking him for this would ever do so if he weren’t like that.
And I don’t agree that it’s fair game to repeat a made up lie because it’s supposedly funny. That’s what Republicans do.
After watching Lemmy spout conspiracy theories galore minutes after the trump shooting and also not give a single shit about this “funny meme” being false, it’s really got me questioning if the left is any smarter than the right. Something I have taken for granted for decades. It’s depressing.
republicans push their lies as facts. no one is trying to claim the couchfucker meme is true. it’s trolling. not remotely the same thing as what republicans do. plus it’s hilarious.
no, vance’s new name is couchfucker, but I’m sure he appreciates you getting upset about it for him
Not everyone understands the trolling. I believed it might be based on something real for a couple days. Nope, just something that was made up. I’ve seen numerous people asking about it also, confused as hell…
I mean even if he really did write some shit like that, it would barely be funny enough to repeat for more than a week. But he didn’t.
saying someone fucks couches is also not remotely comparable to making accusations of rigged elections, rigged judges, pushing, as fact, mountains of conspiracies, and on and on- while the top of their food chain is convicted felon and rapist
it seems ridiculous to even have to spell out these distinctions because of vance the couchfucker
Spreading false information should be avoided if you wish to be seen as being above it. That remains true no matter the content. It seems ridiculous to me that people seem to cling to the joke so hard that I need to spell that out.
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JD “Nothing finer than a sofa recliner” Vance
More cushion for the pushin!
I’m late to the party. What’s up with all that couch fucking?
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You can build a million bridges, but you fuck one single couch, no one calls you a bridge builder.
Made up is just another way to say republikkklown speak.
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Lots of people are saying it, and he has not refuted it. We know it’s true.
Some really smart and honest guy, this guy, he’s smart, and he’s really honest, you know, he told me personally ok, me ok, he said that this couch fucker was also a goat fucker. I have to believe it, i was told it, by a really really smart guy
Ok that’s pretty fucking funny. Has anybody already made R34 of that?
You’re welcome to go look, I’m certainly not going to.
That’s so gross. Which websites though?
Live action bigmouth confirmed, unfortunately.
He prefers the term Furniture Fondler.
I think he’s a natural pairing with Donald Trump, the philanderer. They can bring one girl back home without it getting “weird.”
Richard Gere’s gerbil approved
Hey there’s no proof of that!
It’d be hilarious if a whisper campaign about couch-fuckin’ is what stopped fascism…
No, we’!re talking about the asshole who has plenty of real things to criticize without lowering ourselves to Republican-level antics by repeating random lies from some idiot’s Twitter account.
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Just do the real stuff like his dolphin fetish!